A pair of NFL players lost highly valuable fingers in separate fireworks-related incidents over the 4th of July weekend. Most of us could afford to spare one or two, but when you have an NFL career on the line like Jason Pierre-Paul and C.J. Wilson, your digits are worth seven digits.
To fully comprehend the importance of fingers in football, check out these memorable events in NFL history that wouldn't have happened had the player previously fumbled a sparkler.
It's really hard to jump up in the air and make a remarkable, headgear-assisted grab with the Super Bowl on the line. Now try doing it without fingers.
No one uses their fingers more than Peyton Manning. Each snap of the ball is preceded by a game of linebacker hide-and-go-seek. In addition to his bust, a sculpture of his pointer finger belongs in the Pro Football Hall of Fame.
It's nearly impossible to take and send selfies without fingers. Just ask dolphins.
Holder: the easiest job in football and, perhaps, the world. It's the only position on a football field that makes us think, "Hey, I could do that!" You probably could. Unless, that is, your hands had no fingers on them.
There are more religions in the world than you could, um, count on one hand. The lone similarity shared by the deities of all religions, is that gods LOVE getting pointed at. Forget praying, gods just want a finger! The Dalai Lama and Pope might have spiritual differences, but you better believe they celebrate touchdowns identically.
Cheaters never prosper, but usually have fingers. The only time a New England Patriot lost something due to fireworks was that time that Bill Belichick accidentally blew off his sleeves.
Just sayin'.
