OK, This Makes Sense

Sarah Palin said if she ran WITH Obama, she would have been adored. You bet. Nothing Democrats cozy up to more than a gun loving, anti-choice religious fanatic who doesn't read and has a teenager knocked up by a guy whose life philosophy is "just chillin'..."

George Bush said that he carries the badge of a heroic NYPD cop with him every day. What happens if the cop's mom says, "Lovely, may I look at it?" Think George reaches into his pocket and produces said badge, or does he gulp, giggle, and look really foolish?

OK, Nancy Reagan looked lovingly at Reagan when he spoke, but that gaze from Laura Bush towards George is downright spooky. She looks like she's auditioning for the lead in "Stepford Wives III."

I was hoping that during Bush's farewell speech, Dick Cheney's cellphone would start ringing, and the chimes would start playing "YMCA."

Dennis Miller has reached the depth, saying Mickey Rourke will get screwed out of an Oscar because he said not everything Bush has done is wrong.

Bush was enormously helpful in combatting the spread of AIDS in Africa. There, I said something positive. What bad thing is going to happen to me? Is Dick Morris going to get his own show?

Evidently, saying, "Waterboarding is torture," gets you anywhere in DC these days. It can get Holder confirmed, Democrats promoted, and Bush and Cheney indicted.

Bob Woodward wrote that Rumsfeld snatched a briefing from Rice, telling her, "You won't be needing that." How would he like it if she did that to his glycerine pills?

What Jay Leno is doing to Conan O' Brien is like a divorced spouse moving next door and sampling your Fresh Direct delivery before you eat it (that's a guest booking joke, you filthy bastards).

If Charles Barkley is a gambling addict and alcoholic, at what point does he stop being loveable? When he bets himself into bankruptcy? When the stupor he is in results in the death of a family? I read that people used to get Belushi tooted up and watch him dance and gesticulate maniacally. How did that work out?

People who will now pay Bush to hear him speak should not be allowed to manage their own finances.