COMEDY

One Direction's Email Thread After Announcing Their Hiatus

What are the boys planning now that they're pretty much done?

FROM: futbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com

TO: mrharrystyles@gmail.com; dreamyliampayne@gmail.com; horantheblonde@gmail.com; zaynmalik@gmail.com

SUBJECT: WHAT A RIDE!

Wow, Mates! We did it! We took over the world! 

We're going on hiatus now which means we're probably going to call it quits so we can go down our own paths.

Zayn, I added you to the thread because you'll ALWAYS be a part of the gang whether or not you're on stage with us. Still so glad we got Bus 1 tattoos together.

BUS 1 BOYS 4 LIFE!

Anywho, since we wont be spending all our time together anymore, I propose we take one last trip together before we split up. No girls. No publicists. Just the bad boys!

What do you guys think about BARCELONA!?

Love you lads!

Louis

FROM: horantheblonde@gmail.com

TO: mrharrystyles@gmail.com; dreamyliampayne@gmail.com; zaynmalik@gmail.com; futbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

SMASHING IDEA!

When is everybody free? I'm pretty much free starting today until whenever!

Seriously, anytime! BARCA!

HORAN

FROM: dreamyliampayne@gmail.com

TO: mrharrystyles@gmail.com; futbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com; zaynmalik@gmail.comhorantheblonde@gmail.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

No joke, I got nothing going on now. IN!

DJ Payne

FROM: futbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com

TO: mrharrystyles@gmail.com; zaynmalik@gmail.com; horantheblonde@gmail.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

IT'S ON! JUST BOOKED A VILLA IN BARCA FOR 2 WEEKS IN OCTOBER!

Total comes out to 75,000K. I know this is fast but I'm just so excited!

Harry? Zayn? Weigh in!

FROM: mrharrystyles@gmail.com

TO: dreamyliampayne@gmail.com; zaynmalik@gmail.com; louistomlinson1@gmail.com; horantheblonde@gmail.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

lol

FROM: zaynmalik@gmail.com

TO: dreamyliampayne@gmail.com;mrharrystyles@gmail.com; futbolfantomlinson1@gmail.comhorantheblonde@gmail.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

idk. schedule is cray.

FROM: futbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com

TO: dreamyliampayne@gmail.com; zaynmalik@gmail.com; mrharrystyles@gmail.comhorantheblonde@gmail.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

Unclear. Are you guys in?

FROM: horantheblonde@gmail.com

TO: dreamyliampayne@gmail.com; zaynmalik@gmail.com; mrharrystyles@gmail.comfutbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

yeah harry what are you lol-ing at? how we famous we got? how much fun barca will be? ARE YOU COMING?!?1

FROM: futbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com

TO: horantheblonde@gmail.com; zaynmalik@gmail.com; mrharrystyles@gmail.comdreamyliampayne@gmail.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

Harry and Zayn, just called both your mobiles and it said it you guys can no longer be reached at those numbers. What's up? 

FROM: horantheblonde@gmail.com

TO: dreamyliampayne@gmail.com; zaynmalik@gmail.com; mrharrystyles@gmail.comfutbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

Harry, I'm driving past your house. Want me to pop in?

FROM: dreamyliampayne@gmail.com

TO: futbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com; zaynmalik@gmail.com; mrharrystyles@gmail.comhorantheblonde@gmail.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

Zayn, I just saw your girl on the street and I'm pretty sure she pretended not to see me? I screamed her name and she definitely threw up her hoodie and started power walking away. Like jogging. And it was RIGHT after I shouted.

FROM: horantheblonde@gmail.com

TO: dreamyliampayne@gmail.com; zaynmalik@gmail.com; mrharrystyles@gmail.comfutbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

Harry, your security guard said "There is no Harry here." and "don't come around here anymore or I'll break your legs."

Did you move, Harry? Extremely confused. The guard promised he'd seriously hurt me if he saw me on the property again. Floyd Mayweather must live there now or something.

FROM: futbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com

TO: horantheblonde@gmail.com; zaynmalik@gmail.com; mrharrystyles@gmail.comdreamyliampayne@gmail.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

Harry/Zayn please respond ASAP! The villa was super expensive plus I got us 5 tickets to a futbol match. That along with the airfare AND the Vespas I rented for us makes this vacation pretty expensive on me. I've now spent 100k+ on this trip so I'd like to know that it was't a waste. 

STILL PUMPED FOR BARCA!

FROM: mrharrystyles@gmail.com

TO: horantheblonde@gmail.com; zaynmalik@gmail.com; dreamyliampayne@gmail.comfutbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com

CC: mindyvanderbuilt@caatalent.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

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FROM: futbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com

TO:  zaynmalik@gmail.comhorantheblonde@gmail.com; dreamyliampayne@gmail.com; mindyvanderbuilt@caatalent.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

Why did Harry loop in his acting manager? And why is he NOT on the thread anymore?

Sorry Mindy, but this thread is supossed to be for just the guys. So OUT!

FROM: mindyvanderbuilt@caatalent.com

TO: horantheblonde@gmail.com; zaynmalik@gmail.comdreamyliampayne@gmail.com; futbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE:RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

Liam/Niall/Louis—

On behalf of Mr. Styles, his representation at CAA regrets to inform you that he will not be attending the vacation to Barcelona. It doesn't make sense for Mr. Styles, for professional reasons, at this time. 

If you wish to contact Mr. Styles or be seen with Mr. Styles please email me or my assistant at CAA (stephaniemyers@CAA.com) to schedule a meeting. We can discuss the terms and how it will be beneficial to my client.

We here at CAA wish you all the best in your future endeavors.

 

 

Mindy Vanderbuilt

CAA Talent

Sent from my iPhone 

FROM: zaynmalik@gmail.com

TO: horantheblonde@gmail.com; dreamyliampayne@gmail.com; mindyvanderbuilt@caatalent.com; futbolfantomlinson1@gmail.com

SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE:RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: WHAT A RIDE!

no can do. next time!

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