At the tender age of 72, my father re-married after being a widower for 19 years. My sisters and I were grateful that he wouldn’t spend his twilight years by himself. Now married eight years, he never would have met his wife if he hadn’t put up his online dating profile.
My dad, the introvert, with his three daughters coaching him through the mystery of online dating, is a testament that it can happen at any age. If you think you’re aging out of online dating, I’d like to help you dispel some common beliefs about the number one way people ages 50-plus meet today.
There’s someone for everyone. According to the U. S. Census Bureau, 44% of adult Americans are single. That means there are over 100 million unattached people. To break it down further, 29 percent of adults ages 45-59 are now single, compared with only 19 percent in 1980.
The number of match.com 50-plus singles has grown more than 50 percent from 2009 through 2014 in Dallas and, overall to account for about one-third of all dating members. The company experienced double-digit growth among that group in 2015.
What’s propelled the rise in online dating for the aging boomer population?
More unhappy couples are getting divorced when the kids leave the house. More people are working from home. More people are spending 10 hours a day at the office. More people have computers and are aware of someone who found love online.
Despite the fact that I’ve established that online dating is a worthwhile strategy for women over 50, I still hear some women say, “I don’t want to go on any dates. I don’t want to do online dating. I just want to meet him.” Or, “Men my age only want to date younger women.”
Online dating is where men go to meet women. This is where you have his attention. He’s focused on getting a date with you and having a relationship with you.
Is this the only way to meet men? No, but, who you have available to you in the real world is around you. If you work from home, it’s the UPS driver or the checker at Whole Foods. Need I say more?
Can some men be ageists? Sure, there are lots of men who have blinders on about age. The question then becomes “What can you do better?”
First, your mindset needs to be such that it holds abundance. There are millions of single men. You’re surrounded by abundance all the time. Your’re not surrounded by nothingness.
Mindset.
Second, you think you’re doing everything you can possibly do with online dating. You may be trying your best, but you’re not truly maximizing your potential.
I suspect your profile can be better, your photos can be better, your responses to men could be better, your initial email to men could be better, and your choices in men could be better.
Are you putting in half an hour a day? Are you initiating contact with at least one man a day who states that he’s open to women your age?
The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and getting the same results. I bet you could be doing TEN things differently with your online dating approach.
I’ve supported a multitude of women 50-plus in this area with client successes to boot. I have to believe that their commitment to getting a personalized, customized approach that their girlfriends and family weren’t able to provide helped them realize their dream of finding partnership. So, it’s just not true that NO women over the age of 50 find love online.
All the kids are doing it and so can you.
This article by Nicole DiRocco first appeared in PrimeWomen.com.