I went to dinner with my very wise 97 year old friend, Adelaide, and her old family friend, who was both recently retired and not-long divorced. She was telling tales of her newest passion: pickleball. Neither Adelaide nor I had heard of it, so she explained to us that it’s a cross between tennis, badminton and ping pong.
She told us it’s very popular across the U.S., and that the only place pickleball isn’t all the rage is here in Los Angeles. She has to travel a good distance to fulfill her newfound pickleball passion. She doesn’t mind, though, because this new addiction has brought her to a colorful, expansive moment in her life. She has met men and women of all backgrounds, people with whom she has never before mingled in her otherwise very conservative social settings, all of whom she considers family after two years of regular thrice weekly meetings.
Recently the “big jock” member of their group had a sudden heart attack. Miraculously, he not only recovered but was back at pickleball within a month. But his illness sent a jolt through their community and brought them all to his side. It made them all realize how much they had grown to love each other.
Adelaide responded to her story by stretching her now frail hands and arms across the table between them, and took the woman’s hand: “You are living an Open Sesame kind of life.” .
Aging, illness, retirement, and other life events can cause our lives to shrink. Before we know it we can have very tiny, stagnant lives. I think this newly labeled Open Sesame way of life is one solution to a common aging trap, and it’s only four steps:
- Declare that you want to change in your life.
- Name the door you want to open (new job, new relationship, better marriage, weight loss, etc.)
- Command that the door open.
- Follow-through on what it takes to cause that opening.
And sometimes we have to fake it ‘til we make it! Even if you don’t know how to open the damn door, just identify it, and shout “Open Sesame”! Inspiration for the next move will likely follow.
I had an Open Sesame moment soon after this magical dinner. I was in a state of panic having just wired out a big chunk of money to pay for something very important to me, yet not a necessity. I took the money out of the savings account that is reserved for home emergencies and immediately felt a sense of doom (certainly the roof will cave in now!) and wanted to quickly refill the coffers. I then laughed out loud as I remembered a friend’s incantation for creating abundance: “Jesus Christ, unhand my money now.” That’s one hell of an “Open Sesame” command and I love the idea of talking to Jesus like he’s a buddy who has a wad of my cash in his hand.
I then got into action. When I made my “to do” list for the day I added one very important last item: “Make [x number of] thousands of dollars” (in the amount that I had just wired). The very next day I got a $2000 check that I had completely forgotten was due to me (from an event many months prior), and a string of money-producing elements starting falling into place, one after another.
While I named it, yelled at that damn door and got into action, I think there is definitely some magic to this Open Sesame approach, and I’m very glad my dear, wise friend Adelaide brought it to my attention.