Why You Shouldn't Date Men Who Attempt to "Fix You"

Couple arguing in restaurant
Couple arguing in restaurant

From the moment men were born until they grew up to adulthood, the desire to fix things has been ingrained in their system. It's a quality women love, given that it can come handy should there be anything broken inside the house that needed fixing. However, there are guys who have taken this admired quality a little too far. Fixing broken things and restoring them back to working condition is awesome. However, wanting to fix women because you thought we''re broken? It's totally uncool, uncalled for, and we may just go MIA on you.

Have you ever dated someone like Mr. Fix You? If you did or you're currently in a relationship with him, I'm sure you can identify with my plight. Mr. Fix You is the guy who had made fixing "broken" women his calling. What does he get from doing such a "heroic" act? He thinks it adds up to his masculinity. He believes that it''s the perfect way to prove his worth: when he saves the life of the "broken" woman he's with. What made him think that way? I seriously don't have a clue. But there's one thing I've concluded from my previous relationship with such a guy: he's not worth your beautiful heart. Let me tell you why.

First, you're not some broken toy that someone like him should fix. Yes, you've got issues like everybody else and your life may not be where you want it to be when your paths crossed. However, you didn't enter a relationship so he can deal with all that. You're grown-ass and you can get your life together without his help. You may be feeling like crap now but you know you can always rise up over every obstacle you're faced with without Mr. Fix You's help. In short, you don't need fixing (though he may disagree with that).

Secondly, Mr. Fix You is only with you because you've got issues and he wanted to be the one to fix those for you. He's going to be there by your side for as long as you haven't improved and for as long as he thinks you're not a grown-up yet. He thinks of your weaknesses as "areas for improvement", which is a good thing, except that he ends up controlling how you run your life because of these supposed areas of improvement. And what's even crazier about all these is you won't notice that he's bossing you around already because Mr. Fix You is always there to listen to all of your problems. He's like some Superman who's there whenever you need him to, emergency or not. Simply put, he plays the role of Mr. Nice Guy, too, making it a bit challenging to spot his real identity.

The major difference between the two is Mr. Nice Guy is in it with you whatever happens. On the other hand, Mr. Fix You is in it only until he's seen that you've become a grown-up (well, at least according to his definition of a grown-up). Once he has seen that you no longer needed him because you're already "whole", he'll take pride of his "work" on you then move on to the next "broken" girl that he needs to fix. In short, he'll leave you. What's even worse is that he expects you to take it all lightly because you're a "grown-up" now.

It's always easy for him to walk out the door because it was never about fixing you so you'll be a better version of yourself. It's always been about the satisfaction he gets when he feels like he's making you better. So whenever you feel shitty for any reason, be careful of the guy who offers his shoulders and lends a hand. He may be a Mr. Fix You assuming Mr. Nice Guy's role. Don't take chances because it will never end beautifully.

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