Are you worried the best in life has already occurred? Wish you could get that zing back in you life when you felt like you were on top of the world?
We've all been at a point in our lives where everything works; everything clicks. We're happy with everything; enjoy the day for everything it offers. But sadly once that feeling is in place, it tends to slip away.
Life happens. Things get in the way. Instead of everything being new, everything feels like it's been around the block a few times.
- You've been married for years.
- Your kids are teenagers and no longer require (or even desire) a lot of interaction.
- Your job is old hat; you could do it in your sleep.
- You've been a part of the same clubs for years.
- Even your old exercise routine is worn out and dull ... if you have to jog that same two mile stretch again, it may put you to sleep rather than energize you.
If you were to describe your life in one word, you could sum it all up very well ... boring.
Wait a minute. Boring? You might be thinking your life is anything but boring.
In fact, you never have a break in your day. You rise earlier each day trying to fit it all in. You run from sun up to sundown. You're the kind of person that leaves five minutes early from work to run by the dry cleaners to pick up your suit for tomorrow, while you make a call to check in with your mom, while you seal and address and mail a birthday card to a friend, while you stop by for a few gallons of gas, while you make out a list of things you need from the grocery store ... all before hitting the carpool lane in time to pick up your kids from school.
And then the real rat race begins.
Boring, not in this lifetime. You'd give anything to have a little "boring" time.
Not according to Peter Toohey, author of Boredom: A Living History. (Yes, there's a book on boredom, and it's actually quite interesting.)
Toohey defines boredom as:
a social emotion of mild disgust produced by a temporarily unavoidable and predictable circumstance.
In other words, when you keep doing the same things over and over and over again, boredom sets in and you check out.
The secret to checking back in doesn't mean a radical change where you abandon everything in your life and move two thousand miles away to a remote island with that good looking guy you've been ogling for awhile. (Nice fantasy though, right?)
Instead, I think you can get the passion back into your life by doing these two things:
Choice #1: Choose to be more positive
Actively approach everything you do in a more positive way. I had a mentor tell me years ago that only you could choose to be happy today. If you need something to achieve it, something you don't have right now, you'll keep adding conditions that will make it unachievable. If you tell yourself you'll be happy when you have a million dollars in the bank, for example, that will work until you have the million. Then your mind will up it to two.
But when you switch your mindset enough to be happy in the now, you're world will shift. You'll approach things differently. And likewise new opportunities will open up too. If you want your feelings to change, you have to be the one to bring about the change.
Choice #2: Be self-responsible about your choices
If you've spent weeks, months or even years telling yourself outside forces are to blame for your unhappiness, it's hard to realize you are causing the problem. But when the idea clicks in that you are the only one responsible for your happiness, you begin to see a shift in this pattern.
Begin to look at your approach to everything you do. If you're bored with a job, for example, when was the last time you took an active approach at making it better? Could you take on more responsibility? Could you look for a promotion? Or a job with a new company? Or how about starting up a business? Even a little change to start can change your happiness level, make you more positive about the short term outcome, and less dependent on daydreaming about things that can never be. This is liberating.
Change happens every day, whether we choose to embrace it or not. Boredom is simply a kind way of telling you it's time to move from that comfortable seat you've taken, and get on doing something more with your life. How you embrace it is truly up to you.
Earlier on Huff/Post50:
