Rewrite Your Rules and Live Your Best Life

Did you ever have an ah-ha moment so profound that it felt like your hold world was suddenly snapped into focus?

As if before you were looking at the world through foggy goggles, and now suddenly you have perfect, 20-20 vision?

That's what happened to me when I was challenged in a training by a Success Coach to define my money rules. At first, I thought to myself, I don't really have money rules.

But then, as I sat with that question, my rules began to float to the surface...

I'm bad with money.
You can't afford that.
I don't like thinking about money and finances.
It's hard to make money.
It's challenging to find clients that are willing to pay.
This will never be successful.

We ALL have rules for ourselves -- rules for our personal lives, businesses, relationships, health, spirituality, and even our personality. I could never do/say/accomplish that!

Our "rules" are the stories that we tell ourselves over and over and over again. The things we condition ourselves to believe and therefore act out and expect in our lives.

Some of these rules are conscious. Many are unconscious.

But, here's the kicker that'll bust your world wide open with possibilities.

YOU define your rules.

Throughout our lives, we gather these rules from parents, family, friends, school, society. And, I have no doubt that many of the rules you have in place for yourself serve you well. I'm guessing you have a certain standard of health and happiness that you've come to expect in your life, and since you're able to be here with me now, things are all-around pretty good.

But, I also know that if you're here with me, you're desiring something bigger, better and more profound from this one life you've got. You want to change, not only your own life, but the lives of others. You want to make a lasting mark, leave the world better than you found it and enjoy a life of success and abundance.

If your dream life is still just that, a dream. Something needs changing...and it starts with your RULES.

We honor our rules, live by them, play them out every day. For better or worse, they create our lives. So, why not define your rules in a way that starts drawing more of what you do want into your life?

We say that we're "stuck in a rut" for a reason. We're trapped in a deep groove we've cut into our subconscious through the constant repetition of a limiting rule!

So, if you want to escape that groove and get out of your rut, you have to fill it in with new rules, new ways of thinking and moving through the world.

At first it might feel like a lie or a joke, but as you redefine your rules and repeat them to yourself, they'll become your new norm. You'll start acting, thinking and speaking in accordance with your NEW rules, and your life will take shape around them.

Today, I challenge you to rewrite your rules!


Define an area of your life where you're longing for change. An area where you feel stuck.


Write down your current rules. The limiting story lines and beliefs that are keeping you stuck.


Write down your NEW rules. (It often helps to create your new rules in direct opposition of your previous rules. For example, if you've been saying "I'll never lose these 10 pounds because I hate working out", create a new rule such as "I feel fitter and lighter every day because I LOVE moving my body!".)


Repeat them DAILY! Write them on post-it notes and put them around your home, use them as bookmarks, phone backgrounds and journal about them. Surround yourself with your new rules. Start LIVING them every day. Make them your new norm.

This works. It takes time, but it works. I promise.

If you're ready to stop living small from a place of fear, worry and lack and start claiming the life your desire and deserve, this is where to start. Redefine your rules so they're in alignment with where you want to go, and you'll be setting yourself on course to get there!

Author Bio: Cailen Ascher is a Clarity Coach for women entrepreneurs who are ready to realize, own and live their fullest potential professionally and personally. She's been spotlighted on Entrepreneur on Fire, Huffington Post, MindBodyGreen, Gary Vaynerchuk's Q&A and was the 2014 Gold Stevie Award winner for Young Female Entrepreneur. Her coaching and teachings have helped 1000s create purpose-full businesses. Learn how to take your business from stuck to $6K months at