Quarterback Rex Grossman is apparently trying to cut in on my action as a football joke writer. He said the Redskins are going to win the NFC East. The NFC East?! The Redskins couldn't win the SEC East. They couldn't win the Big East. They couldn't beat East Side High School.
What is he talking about? This division has the Eagles, the Cowboys, and the Giants. Vegas has the Redskins' odds just below Newt Gingrich.
Grossman is yet another leader in Washington who is out of touch with reality.
Speaking of that, the Super Bowl champion Packers went to visit the White House. Just from being near the president, they were downgraded to NFC champs.
The Republicans were thrilled. They know the pattern: First come the Packers. Then come the movers.
The president said he always wanted to play football, but his mom wouldn't let him. Because he doesn't have a backbone.
It was probably best he didn't play football. He's really good at running, but not much else.
In the next year or so, the NFL is expected to have some female officials. Players are not allowed to touch a referee. So it might be the safest place for a woman in the stadium.
Referee is a good spot for a woman: You've got a yellow handkerchief, you feel the need to tell the whole stadium what you're thinking, and you get to decide if anyone scores.
The Cardinals lost rookie RB Ryan Williams for the season -- gone before he even got started. He pulled a Tim Pawlenty.
According to their spokesperson, six former players and one current player are suing the NFL for failing to properly treat them for concussions. According to the players themselves, "Blibber blabber snarf."
Former Chicago Bears QB Jim McMahon is one of the seven players. McMahon is used to winning. But this time he can't hand the case off to Walter Payton.
Concussions are associated with headaches, irrationality and dizziness. Maybe Michele Bachmann has a concussion.