Senator Craig I Am

This was emailed to me by a HuffPo commenter whose screen name is gabbyhayes; with his permission (but not Dr Seuss's) I'm posting it for your delectation.

Senator Craig I Am

I am not gay with a coked up page
I am not gay with the underaged
I am not gay when I tap your foot
I am not gay keep your big mouth shut
I am not gay in a bathroom stall
I am not gay, not gay at all

I am not gay with a wide, wide stance
I am not gay in my senator pants
I am not gay with a cat in a hat
Here's my card--what do you think of that?
I am not gay in a bathroom stall
I am not gay, not gay at all

I am not gay in an Idaho paper
I am not gay please hide my caper
I am not gay in my childless marriage
I am not gay in a baby carriage
I am not gay in a bathroom stall
I am not gay, not gay at all

I am not gay with an undercover dick
I am not gay--no, not a lick
I saw some paper on the floor
I picked it up--no, nothing more
I am not gay in a bathroom stall
I am not gay, not gay at all

Let me be clear, I am not vague
I dearly love my Mrs. Craig
I am not a sad old perv
My only desire is to serve
I am not gay in a bathroom stall
I am not gay, not gay at all