Seth MacFarlane Oscars Monologue: Actor Opens The 2013 Academy Awards

Seth MacFarlane hosted the 85th annual Academy Awards on Sunday evening.

"Welcome to the Oscars. The quest to make Tommy Lee Jones laugh begins now," MacFarlane said in his Oscars opening, getting a chuckle out of Jones.

MacFarlane's monologue continued, with the host mentioning last year's Best Actor winner, Jean Dujardin. "He couldn't make it in the talkies," he joked, referencing Dujardin's lack of visibility since his big win for "The Artist."

An "Argo" quip followed -- including a zinger about Ben Affleck's missing nomination for Best Director -- and an eye-roll-inducing "Django Unchained" joke about Chris Brown and Rihanna.

MacFarlane's monologue was interrupted by Captain Kirk -- A.K.A. William Shatner -- who tried to stop him from ruining the Academy Awards. "Why couldn't they just get Tina [Fey] and Amy[ Poehler] to host?" Shatner said.

The Oscar host then broke into a song about boobs, naturally, featuring the line, "We saw your boobs..." over and over, followed by a more classic Hollywood dance number featuring Channing Tatum and Charlize Theron.

Daniel Radcliffe and Joseph Gordon-Levitt hit the stage next, following a sock puppet reenactment of "Flight," to join MacFarlane for a little soft-shoe dance number.

And then MacFarlane made out with Sally Field. Yep, that happened.

His monologue then wrapped up with a big number to a modified version of "Be Our Guest."

This is MacFarlane's first time hosting the Oscars. He followed Billy Crystal, who hosted last year's awards show, and the less-than-dynamic duo of Anne Hathaway and James Franco, who hosted the 83rd annual Academy Awards in 2011.

As far as MacFarlane is concerned, it will be his only time hosting the awards, telling the AP last week, "Who knows how this will go. Even if it goes great, I just don't think that I could do this again. It's just too much with everything else that I have to do. I'm happy to be doing it and I will be thrilled to have done it, assuming I get out of there in one piece, but I really think this is a one-time thing for me."

MacFarlane had the unfortunate luck of following Tina Fey and Amy Poehler's celebrated monologue at January's Golden Globes. The "SNL" duo's tested chemistry provided witty one-liners such as a joke about Kathryn Bigelow, "When it comes to torture, I trust the lady who spent three years married to James Cameron," and the addressing of an iconic actress, "Meryl Streep is not here tonight. She has the flu, I hear she's amazing in it."

MacFarlane hosted the 85th annual Academy Awards at Hollywood's Dolby Theatre.

More information about this year's performances and winners can be found in the live blog below.

Ben Affleck

2013 Oscars