I spent a glorious weekend with my GM daughter, attending The Hamptons International Film Festival, eating, shopping, practicing handstands on the beach, working out, watching a Modern Family marathon, eating ice cream cake (or in her case, just the frosting) taking walks, endless talks, and birthday gifts.
We tied it up with a homemade Italian dinner at my friend's house, complete with white wine, Zitti, pumpkin spice donuts, and laughs.
On Saturday night, we decided to shake it up and watch a movie. Within seconds of opening the DVD cabinet, The Way We Were seemed to magically fall off the shelf and into our hands. Maybe it was an omen.
"I love Barbra and I've never seen the movie but I always wanted to," she squealed. This was music to my ears. And how could I not know that she likes Babs?!
Being a huge Barbra fan, (to say the least) I thought I had died and gone to heaven. Maybe she did come out of me. Nay, I would've felt something. She was going to be 21 in a few weeks, and I saw this as a right of passage. I was honored to be her guide.
I warned her that there would be tears, (mine), even though it was probably the 10th time watching it. We curled up on the couch and hit play.
It was probably the only time that I allowed talking while watching a movie, which says a lot if you've ever gone to the movies with me. I demand absolute silence; no whispering, no checking the phone, no nudging, no nothing. I'm a purist. But with this movie, I allowed the occasional comment.
"Barbra looks so good. She's so cute. Robert Redford really isn't my type. What else has he been in?"
She told me about the Sex and The City episode that references The Way We Were. I told her that I hadn't seen it but promised to do so post haste. I have since seen the episode.
It was so fun to watch through her eyes, listening to her interpretation.
When it was over, as promised, I was crying, and through my tears I said, "Why? Why wouldn't he see his daughter? Why wouldn't he want to? I mean just because he and Katie didn't work out, wouldn't he want to see his own child?" She looked at me, and without missing a beat said, "Because he's an asshole."
Holy crap, had I been defending Hubbell's actions all these years? How could I excuse his absentee father behavior? Did his good looks throw me off? Maybe his behavior added to the mystery and romance?
I didn't want to see Hubbell in that light because their love and passion was so intense, that if I reduced him to being just another a-hole, it would've soiled the whole relationship for me.
Theirs was not a black and white relationship, but it was interesting to hear a 21-year-old's point of view, because it seemed that, for her, it was pretty cut and dry. Asshole. Period. End of conversation.
I need deeper reasons and explanations, because I feel that that is more like real life. Our different interpretations probably speaks to our age, wisdom and experience.
Relationships are hard and I'm mad at Big and Hubbell for walking away because they wanted simple. Carrie and Katie are complicated women, with curly hair, and I can relate.
I was full after our weekend together, and not just gastronomically. I was full of joy, pride and a whole lot of love. Sometimes it feels as if sharing, especially with the kids, is my purpose; to bring Barbra Joan Streisand into the lives of young adults, one movie and hit song at a time. For example.