A new movement is afoot given the stressful and chaotic political scene in the United States. Thousands of women have come forward in recent weeks to shed light on their painful pasts and to attempt to continue their healing by speaking openly about their very personal experiences of sexual assault or injury. Women, who have been the victim of such harm, often on multiple occasions, are finding a sense of community with the masses of women who have suffered and are courageously taking their power back from their abusers. This massive online liberation was started by author Kelly Oxford who created the hashtag #notokay on Twitter.
In my private practice, which focuses on helping primarily women, heal from sexual injury, I’ve seen that many have been emotionally triggered by what’s been revealed in the recent and recurrent media posts and revelations concerning the U.S. election.
Sexual injury is commonly the source of tremendous shame and has significant effects on body image, self-worth, the ability to have healthy relationships (especially intimate relationships), altered health and much more. Given that reporting such assaults can often bring additional shame and persecution, most such incidents are not only unreported but commonly hidden, not shared and emotionally locked away in the subconscious closet, to remain neither resolved or healed. Such traumas are vulnerable to being triggered by current environmental stimuli that resurrect images, thoughts and feelings, bringing them all to the surface. Many who courageously dare to shed light on such events from their past are scorned further, even being accused of having manufactured such stories, for after all, if it really happened, why didn’t they tell anyone at the time?
Fortunately, the silver lining of recent events, is that women around the world are taking action and often for the first time, sharing widely online and in public forums their experiences to put the limelight on this epidemic in the hope of making real and substantial cultural change.
Here are some of the conditioned reflex responses that have been set off recently in an effort to explore why so many women are speaking out. In addition we have provided news reports (primarily from the Huffington Post which has given the issue significant attention) that more fully explain and illustrate the power these triggers have to bring events, even decades old, to the present moment of daily life.
Body Shaming Trigger: This is any negative comment or discrimination made towards a person’s body, weight, size or shape. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trump-fat-shaming-machado_us_57eadfe4e4b0c2407cda4740 A recent client in her mid-twenties worked with me and tapped (using EFT and Matrix Reimprinting processes) on an incident that happened in 7th grade when a boy in the hall called her thunder-thighs in front of her friends which has had an ongoing negative effect on her body image.
Gas Lighting Trigger: Is a form of emotional abuse where the abuser denies culpability and makes it sound like the person harmed is the one who is lying, crazy, or making it all up. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/the-worst-part-of-the-trump-tapes_us_57fbb906e4b0d786aa52b946 A woman came in to see me wanting to release pain from a previous marriage. In that relationship she was told she was too sensitive and was made to feel like she was the “evil” mother that broke up the family when in fact her husband was an addict, contributing to the primary causes of the failed marriage.
Physically Threatening Trigger: http://www.aol.com/video/view/clinton-says-trump-stalked-her-during-debate/5800f6c7c4d21f741d3ff8a5/ This is a form of physical intimidation. It could be as simple as hovering over someone which may or may not include physical contact. A client recently remembered an incident with her bullying older brother hovering over her bed at night to remind her that if she told on him, “She’d get it.”
Sexually Assaulted Trigger: Sexual assault is any type of sexual contact or behavior that occurs without the explicit consent of the recipient. Falling under the definition of sexual assault are sexual activities as forced sexual intercourse, forcible sodomy, child molestation, incest, fondling, and attempted rape. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/a-running-list-of-all-the-women-whove-accused-donald-trump-of-sexual-assault_us_57ffae1fe4b0162c043a7212 With the recent news reports a client suddenly remembered being grabbed by a neighbor with sexual intonations in the park as she was sliding down the playground slide.
Work-Related Sexual Harassment Trigger: Unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature that tends to create a hostile or offensive work environment. Sexual harassment is a form of sex-discrimination that occurs in the workplace. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/donald-trump-jr-women-harrassment-workforce_us_5800b9bbe4b0162c043b532e A female client explained how afraid she was of being fired if she told human resources that her boss was rubbing himself against her whenever they were alone.
Verbally Threat of Violence Trigger: Threats of Violence: Makes statements like, "I'll break your neck," or "I'll kill you," and then dismisses them with "Everyone talks that way," or "I didn't really mean it." http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trump-clinton-shoot_us_57aa2f6de4b0ba7ed23dd652 Female client in her fifties recalled a moment in her previous relationship where her boyfriend accused her of talking to another man at a party and told her not to fall asleep that night or she might not wake up.
Insinuating Lack of Physical Health Trigger: This is just what it sounds like. If a person is recovering from a long illness or still suffers from one, they may be perceived of being incapable of performing at work or at home. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/donald-trump-hillary-clinton-health_us_57b221dbe4b007c36e4fc559 Client overhead her boss telling a co-worker that my client was, “Not to be counted on. She’s just not….you know, healthy”
Infidelity Trigger: Defined as having committed adultery or cheating on a romantic partner in a monogamous relationship. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/donald-trump-pleading-the-fifth_us_57ed79dee4b024a52d2de46d A recent client thought she had completely forgiven her husband’s indiscretion from years prior until speculation about infidelity appeared in the news last week and set off a wave of anger and resentment.
Power and Money Trigger: The fear response that occurs when you think that someone with more power or money can get away with anything. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/robert-reich/the-real-scandal-of-trump_b_12299822.html A woman client in her eighties reports being afraid of the influence of a male family member who is wealthy. She was concerned that her inheritance will be stolen as it had been once prior by another male family member years earlier.
Sources in addition to provided links.
Author: Alina Frank is the author of the best-selling book How to Want Sex Again; Rekindling Passion Using EFT. She maintains a private coaching practice in the Pacific Northwest and empowers individuals to heal from their painful past to reclaim their sexuality and passion for life. www.alinafrank.com