Sleeping Beauty publicly confronted the Prince today, "What kind of degenerate sicko kisses sleeping women? Seriously? Don't kiss sleeping women, you mother-humpin' perv."
She went on to announce plans to file charges against the Prince.
The Prince declined comment but his attorney issued a statement on his behalf, "We all understood Sleeping Beauty to be under the cursed spell of the spurned fairy. Ms. Beauty's behavior was consistent with prophesy -- she pricked her finger on a spindle and fell into a deep sleep. Thus, the Prince braved tall trees, thorns, and brambles to save her. She should be grateful rather than opportunistically seek publicity by sullying the Prince's good name."
Sleeping Beauty fired back, "That fairy was cray and my parents were right to shun her -- besides, spindles? Please! Clearly the Prince is grasping at straws to justify his criminal behavior. Anyone who buys into this fairy tale is equally depraved and delusional. Unless you live in a John Hughes movie, these are the basics everyone learns by junior high: No means no. Yes means yes. And kissing a sleeping woman makes you a stage-one date rapist."
There has been no word from law enforcement on whether they will proceed with an arrest.