Trick or treat, smell my feet, KIDS USED TO VOLUNTEER TO FIGHT FOR THEIR COUNTRY!
On Saturday's Halloween edition of "Saturday Night Live," Bobby Moynihan's "Drunk Uncle" made an appearance on "Weekend Update" to school everyone on why Halloween -- and, frankly, AMERICA -- just isn't the same anymore.
Hey, so maybe he's not a "Jack of all lanterns," but give Drunk Uncle a break! Listen to his Halloween rant above and you'll be asking for goji berries in your Dropbox before you know it.
"Saturday Night Live" airs Saturdays at 11:30 p.m. ET on NBC.