Being in my twenties and in a relationship, I've found myself asking whether I am ready to live with my boyfriend or not. Am I moving too fast? Sending the wrong signals? Missing out on the joys of being single and independent? Am I going to hate him, or worse, will he hate me? There are enough questions swarming my head to make me want to just call off the whole thing.
But no, that's not how I handled it. When my boyfriend decided he was going to quit his secure job in Milwaukee to come find a job near me in New York, I did what came naturally. I welcomed my boyfriend into my apartment and played house for about a year. At that point, time was up and we decided to make another move (together) to Boston. Of course, coordinating our jobs was no small feat and he had to go a few months before me, but we both made it up there -- and into my parents' home.
Let me preface this by saying that I have only been dating my boyfriend for a little over two years. We started dating the day we met (basically!). But with a big move to a new city, nothing seemed more comfortable than going home to live with my family. Of course, my friends told me I was crazy. My peers silently judged. But to me, it was the only thing that made sense. What's wrong with saving some money while living with all the people you love?
Of course, my method to living with my boyfriend is different than most. But here are the things I learned in order to make living together work:
- Remember to love each other. While it can be easy to get caught up in rent and utility payments, chores and the routine of life, it's so important to remember to look at each other with the love you started with. Keep the TV off during dinner so that you can talk and connect. Make time to go out -- and actually get dressed up -- once in a while. See each other as more than a roommate.