The concept of blackmail usually renders an idea of demands for money -- some form of punishment by another unless a demand is met.
How many of us commit spiritual blackmail on ourselves?
We behave a certain way to fit in with a crowd (and in my line of work, I see men and women of advanced age compromising themselves to fit in as frequently as middle school youth). We allow our children to behave in a way we normally wouldn't so that they will be accepted by their peers; make the grade; make the team; get the scholarship; marry the person/family.
We turn a deaf and oftentimes numbed ear to inappropriate behavior so that we don't rock the boat. We sit idly by while people speak poorly of their "friends." We allow ourselves to only know enough so that we don't have to face the truth.
Funny thing about the truth, it is so multi-faceted and riddled with as much joy as pain, that it is rarely fully embraced. We convince ourselves we KNOW what is happening in our world when we don't fully accept what is happening within.
I'll never claim to have all the answers, but I have discovered that in order to live a fuller life, you must be willing to face YOU. Full admission of your strengths as well as weaknesses. You are the only constant on this journey. Others come and go and love slips and rises. Find comfort in you while learning to accept yourself as your best friend. Stop offering yourself permission to hate another in order to ignore what is going on in your own life. Stop looking to other avenues for happiness before fully accepting yourself.
Restraints, judgements, anger, hate, jealousy and insecurities result when the spirit is denied.
I believe that once you've defined your own parameters, you will have a clearer understanding of what is and is not acceptable. You won't be as comfortable allowing things to take place in your life that weaken your spirit. You won't do whatever it takes to fit in. Not only will you stop committing spiritual blackmail on yourself, you will begin to experience the soaring of your spirit.
A spirit unleashed by an evolved and developed mind result in a life fully experienced.