State of Mind: Tired

This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email.

Do you wake up one day and realize that you haven't had a decent sleep in... wait a minute, you can't even remember?

That's right. This feeling hit me early this morning as I woke up at dawn to send company newsletters. Where's my sleep? Where's my rest? Why can't I feel fresh and ready to take on the world? Maybe because only few hours of sleep per night doesn't quite cut it. I'm a passionate person, but my passion towards toils and chores disappear immediately after a bad night. Or two. Or 10.

I work in marketing communications and it's an everyday challenge. You have to (and get to) evolve all the time. You get to feel you never know enough, like all the time. There's always new stunts and skills to learn, and you'll have to be awake for the world. And at mornings like this my personality is going from sunshine to grumpy cat. Not a good thing. At mornings like these I would love someone to talk to, someone's shoulder to cry on and heal. Walk on seaside and share the melancholia of my soul. I'm not ready to go on a train to sit an inch from a stranger. I don't have the stamina to or patience for anything. I feel like such a bad person.

Yet, I know that when I get enough rest, I'm a totally different me. I want that girl! Not this moaning, complaining, self-centered me. I once heard that time loses it's meaning and just flies when you're doing something that matters to you, and you love. For me it's writing. (I'm going to tell you more about my newly discovered novel project later on.) What's yours?

Bear with me, okay? This is for you.