Stephen Colbert wants you to know that even though this election was one hell of an exhausting ride, “you survived.”
To conclude his live election special, “Stephen Colbert’s Live Election Night Democracy’s Series Finale: Who’s Going To Clean Up This S‑‑‑?,” the comedian and late-night host summed up America’s sentiments with a somber and poignant closing monologue.
“Now I think we can agree that this has been an absolutely exhausting, bruising election for everyone, and it has come to an ending that I did not imagine. We all now feel the way Rudy Giuliani looks,” Colbert joked. “Seeing this election, people all around the world... everybody’s going to be saying, ‘Has America lost its mind?’ And the answer is, evidently, ‘Back off buddy, we got 300 million guns, and we’re kinda stressed right now.’”
Colbert went on to note that the country is now “more divided as ever,” before asking, “How did our politics get so poisonous?”
“I think it’s because we overdosed,” he said. “Especially this year. We drank too much of the poison.”
Colbert reminded everyone that, now that the election is finally over, “we as a nation agree that we should never, ever have another election like this one.”
“Now please get out there and kiss a Democrat,” he said. “Go hug a Republican. Go give a Libertarian a reach-around. You survived. Good night, and God bless America.”