THE BLOG

Stop Squeezeing Your Child Into The Mold

Do you feel like you're incapable of parenting your child? At some point or another, every parent becomes doubtful about their parenting.
This post was published on the now-closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email.

2016-04-11-1460367352-8575121-WhyYouShouldStopSqueezeingYourChildIntoTheMold1.jpg

Do you feel like you're incapable of parenting your child?

At some point or another, every parent becomes doubtful about their parenting.

Will your child become healthy and educated, will your child get a job, will your child experiment with narcotics? Will your child get married, will your child end up abusive?

The list could go on and on, but it starts with those small struggles. Why won't he eat vegetables? Why isn't she out of diapers by now? Is he really sick or just playing me? I wish she would just listen to what I say instead of slamming the door in my face.

And maybe you're embarrassed to tell people about it?

Since every parent faces this from time to time, you have no reason to feel that way. I would say that you should actually say it out loud. Tell people that you struggle, ask for help. Show your vulnerability. Be human.

Rest assured that you are doing your best. Asking for help isn't a sign of weakness, it's a sign of strength.

You acknowledge your own limits and are open for other opinions.

All of the above can be said about parents to A4 children. But not for parents to children on the Autism spectrum.

Why?

Because even if every child in the world are unique, children on the spectrum are double unique.

So the teachings for A4 children, does not apply to children on the spectrum. They need individualized teachings.

For me it's kind of strange when you think of e.a the school systems. They say that every child should be integrated, that every child is unique, and that there's room for everyone.

And when it comes to action, everyone is integrated if they fit into the mold that's been made up as a universal law, that all of a sudden everyone is NOT unique.

Those who fit the mold are accepted, and those who doesn't are not. They are all of a sudden seen like a burden.

I'm not a huge fan of this "there is room for everyone." The reason? It's obviously not.

Everyone is unique, and as long as there's a mold, there will always be those who don't fit.

You teach your child "Do as I say, not as I do."

So why this stress over parenting skills?

If the society says everyone's unique, why not start treating each other like that, instead of trying to squeeze each other into a mold that doesn't really fit anybody?

What's your thought on this? Share in the comments now!