WOMEN

The 20 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week

The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant -- but succinct -- wisdom. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious 140-character musings. For this week's great tweets from women, scroll through the list below. Then visit our Funniest Tweets From Women page for our past collections.

Can't believe Playboy is replacing nudes with 200 pages of photos of Meryl Streep wearing political tee shirts.
— Erin Gloria Ryan (@morninggloria) October 13, 2015

im so jealous of people with dimples you disgust me you fucking cutie pies
— Tracy LaFway Clayton (@brokeymcpoverty) October 14, 2015

Playboy is no longer publishing nude photos. Are we supposed to judge women on their BRAINS now? Gross.
— Wendi Aarons (@WendiAarons) October 13, 2015

Halloween costume ideas w/appliance box: Rubik's Cube Amazon delivery Sexy Cardboard
— Abbi Crutchfield (@curlycomedy) October 16, 2015

Life isn't about finding yourself. It's about finding a free wifi connection.
— Taylor Trudon (@taylortrudon) October 16, 2015

I didn't read all that stuff you wrote under your ig pic.
— denise (@Stellacopter) October 15, 2015

Kids, in my day there were very few "sexy" costume options and most of us didn't want them because our parents raised us, not the internet.
— OhNoSheTwitnt (@OhNoSheTwitnt) October 15, 2015

Is there a YouTube tutorial on how to makeup contour your whole body
— Jeannie (@JeanGreasy) October 15, 2015

Christopher Columbus discovered America the same way my college roommate "discovered" Radiohead
— Randi Lawson (@RandiLawson) October 12, 2015

*me when ppl sit where i usually sit* ok wow so rude *me when i sit in some1 else's spot* UHM IM SORRY IS THIS GRADE SCHOOL? GROW UP, HELEN
— Alexis Wilkinson (@OhGodItsAlexis) October 15, 2015

I refuse to open the cabinet under my kitchen sink because I'm convinced a spider holding a small trident is in there waiting to kick my ass
— audrey farnsworth (@audipenny) October 13, 2015

i have a pumpkin candle burning, banana chocolate chip muffins in the oven and a smug-as-fuck satisfaction with my love of fall
— Jessica Roy (@JessicaKRoy) October 16, 2015

date someone who makes you feel like another person is washing your hair
— Hannah Giorgis (@ethiopienne) October 13, 2015

"You never forget your first time," my grandma said tonight. About voting for Franklin Roosevelt.
— Chloe Angyal (@ChloeAngyal) October 16, 2015

Fuck it: Netflix and chili
— Molly (@Molly_Kats) October 13, 2015

Hobbies: saying, "I'm still hungry" when the other person is in the middle of a sentence
— ScaryKoCo (@MaryKoCo) October 13, 2015

just googled "woman who goes to a lot of weddings" because i was trying to remember some movie but google was like "bitch that's you"
— Jazmine Hughes (@jazzedloon) October 16, 2015

🎶ladies leave your man at home🎶 That's it that's the whole song
— Caro (@socarolinesays) October 16, 2015

90% of confirming plans is hoping the other person will cancel
— Lane Moore (@hellolanemoore) October 14, 2015

Your inspirational tweets indicate you're drunk. I'm inspired.
— It's me (@its33me33) October 16, 2015

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