The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant ― but succinct ― wisdom. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious 140-character musings. For this week’s great tweets from women, scroll through the list below. Then visit our Funniest Tweets From Women page for our past collections.
By the time Trump's first term is done, we're gonna need a wall to keep people in.— Erin 🎶Gloria🎶 Ryan (@morninggloria) January 20, 2017
My mom just told me that when I was a kid I abandoned my preschool class and when asked why I told her "those kids are getting on my nerves"— Akilah Hughes (@AkilahObviously) January 18, 2017
You deserve a nap.— Chrissa Hardy (@chrissahardy) January 18, 2017
Lord please grant me the confidence of a white dude who's about to become the head of a federal agency he doesn't understand— Lauren Kelley (@lauren_kelley) January 19, 2017
1 margarita: I tell you I love your hair.— Kendra Alvey (@Kendragarden) January 19, 2017
2 margaritas: We take a selfie.
3 margaritas: I convince you that your apartment is haunted.
We are living in that part of Ghostbusters where Gozer is summoned then all those evil creatures start coming out of the street.— Vanessa Ramos (@thatRamosgirl) January 13, 2017
Just put "shave legs" into my Google calendar, in case you were wondering how I'm doing.— Naomi (@Blacktress) January 15, 2017
Film student:"I'm very influenced by realistic french new wave"— Leigh Lahav (@leighlahav) January 19, 2017
Film student means: "This is the only type of films I can afford to make"
is it too much to ask that everyone in my life quit their jobs or drop out of school so they can text me back on time— farwz (@farwzz) January 17, 2017
renaming "waking up early" to "up before the Trump tweets"— maura quint (@behindyourback) January 14, 2017
know that uneasy feeling you get watching Walking Dead, right before a walker pops out & rips someone's face off? that's how America feels.— Franchesca Ramsey (@chescaleigh) January 19, 2017
"Let the chips fall where they may."— JenniFerCryinOutLoud (@sip_at_home_mom) January 18, 2017
My toddler's approach to life, snack time, board games, baking, and scratching paint off the walls.
I typed, "I'm tired" and autocorrect changed it to, "You're 35. This is just who you are now."— Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) January 18, 2017
[school drop-off]— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) January 17, 2017
Kid, "I forgot to brush my teeth!"
So I did what any good mother/freshmaker would and gave him a pack of Mentos.