It's not about being selfish, it's about being aware, becoming more... and asking for a hand.
Too many people can't see beyond themselves and their own challenges to see that others are also on this journey we call life, and just might have a thing or two to share that could make your own life more rewarding. Who doesn't want to have more, experience more, live more fully? I believe we all do. The idea is to find a cure for what ails you.
The disease of me. That's what leadership guru John C. Maxwell called it in a recent interview. He says most people have an illness - the inability to get past themselves. At first you think he's talking about being ego-centric and partly he is, after all we are human, we live in our own bodies, carry around our own thoughts and have to look ourselves in the mirror every day. We need to know we are OK. It's human nature to be a bit selfish, we have to live with ourselves, there is no escape. You can't run from you. But if you don't get out of your own way, there is no way you can move toward what you really want, or become who you envision yourself to be.
Awareness helps, learning helps, finding a way to serve others helps... a lot. It's more difficult to only focus on you when you are focused on other people and how you can help them, raise them up, make their lives just a little less difficult, or a little more pleasurable.
Case in point: there's this blog what I write, (http://markbrodinsky.com/), a sample of which you are reading - where more than 400 times over the past few years I have sat down and simply shared what I am learning, it's that simple. I read it, I listen to it, or I have a conversation and take in the information and then share it here. When I write and share what I have learned it is about giving back - it's not about me - it's about you. But the simple act of sharing and of giving makes the lessons more permanent for me as well, so in turn I win too. My Sunday Series and those ,stories of courage, hope and inspiration has the same focus, to share someone else's story with the world in the hopes that others can learn and be moved, or inspired.
It's the same concept as gratitude. In your mind it's impossible for fear and misery to exist in the same space as gratitude. Gratitude washes it all away. And in the act of being grateful you are most times not focusing on you, but what happened to you and likely how someone, or something helped you in that moment. A way to get past yourself to think about others and the outside world.
The other cure to the disease is to ask for help. How many of us try to go it alone? We think we have the answers, pretend we have the answers, or are too afraid to find the right answer, so we live life on the fly. Not a good idea. A better solution is to ask for help, mentors, educators, teachers, intelligent friends, family members or colleagues. People you respect or people who have been where you want to go and can guide you on the same path. That is true power.
Mentorship is inexpensive; books, CD's, conferences, seminars, or a simple conversation. If you can't afford to pay for one-on-one coaching, then hit the library, (yes they still exist), and pick up a book or CD for free. Read or listen to the thoughts, ideas, processes and lessons from someone else, dead or alive. They most likely have something to share which will impact your own life, maybe even one idea which could change your life, you never know. Then you will be well on your way to the cure for what ails you -- the disease of me.
Until next time, thanks for taking the time,
Mark
Mark Brodinsky, Author, Blogger, Podcaster, Emmy Winner, Field Sales Leasder: USHEALTH Advisors