The Gift of Goodbye

Apparently I raised a veal.
And my calf is about to leave the crate.
Got to teach my son how to do laundry.
And how to cook.
He knows how to make PanOreos.
That's an Oreo dipped in pancake batter.
But man can not live by PanOreos alone.
Speaking of alone.
We're going to be empty nesters.
Hate that phrase.
How about Free birds?
The nest wasn't that crowded anyway.
We only have one kid.
But there have been lots of kids.
In and out of the house and the refrigerator.
And plenty of kids around from my charity Mending Kids.
We've had kids from El Salvador to Ethiopia live with us.
Then there's the dog, the cat and the turtle.
The pets will stay in the nest.
I recently asked my Mom what it was like when my sisters and I left.
She said...
Well, I had the cat.
My dog is going to be an emotional wreck.
Then there's me...
We're in the middle of prom and graduation.
All happy.
All making me teary.
I'm going to have to do something drastic.
Like go back to work.
Having said that...
Getting fired was the best thing that ever happened to me.
I don't say this flippantly.
It was.
My job was great.
I got to host a morning TV show in LA.
Then go about my day.
Never missed a field trip.
Even if I showed up in full makeup.
Moms were like...
Who's the chick with the false eyelashes?
Then I got fired.
Now I call that...
The gift of goodbye.
I slept in.
Til 6:20 anyway.
Got to wake up my kid.
Make him breakfast.
And lunch.
Drive him to school.
Then he drove me.
Then he drove off without me.
I was there every morning of High School.
And every morning I'd say...
"Go save the world".
This morning he said...
"Why do you say that?
You sound like a Disney movie."
I said...
If this was a Disney movie I'd be dead.
They always kill the mother.
I'm not trying to be Disney Dorothy.
Or flippant
I want him to see he can do little things to make the world a little better.
I hope he will.
And I hope to do more of that when I'm a free bird.
That or move to Italy.
To write.
And drink wine and coffee all day.
I'll find a way to feather the nest.
That f-ing empty nest.
I'm getting ready to give my son the gift of goodbye.
He's ready.
We're not.
We'll miss that boy when he goes to college.
Miss the attitude.
The eye rolling.
Even the laundry...
But he'll be a citizen of the world.
Hopefully making it a slightly better place.
Enjoy the veal.