Hillary Wins! Hillary Wins! Hillary Wins!
Down for the count, going in to the bottom of the ninth, she picked herself off the mat and kept swinging the racket, finally kicking the winning field goal on her way to a big time victory, said the mixed metaphor pundits.
But after being left for dead, just how did she come out on top?
Was it because of her pluck or her luck?
Was it Bill? How about Stephanopoulus?
Nope. Not even close.
The man who swung the big bat that produced the winning margin in Pennsylvania, sending the Obama crowd home dejected was one of Clinton's former worst nightmares. None other than that horrid vast right wing conspiracy all wrapped up in one hunk of Fox manhood.
Little ole Sean Hannity.
You think Colbert's got heat?
Hannity's so hot, you could cook an egg on any one of his twenty-one hours a week on TV and radio.
Try Obama's Pain.
Think Chris Matthews plays hardball?
Try ducking out of the way of one of Hannity's chin high, knock-down,100 mile-per-hour kitchen sink-loaded questions.
He may not have invented talk radio, but Hannity has ushered the talk game into the steroid era. In this election cycle, Hannity has been doing things that politically can only be deemed: unnatural. He's not only batting from the right side of the plate, he batting from the left...and he's doing it AT THE SAME TIME.
He's not only pitching for his team, he's become the designated hitter for the second place team in the other division And he seems to be able to knock it out of the park with one hand on the bat. He's always been a heavy-hitter, but this election, if he isn't swinging a corked bat, this guy has to be on the juice.
Sure, Al Gore was knocked back off the plate with hard up and under the chin, brush back pitches, and John Kerry basically had to play hurt from a severe swift boat knee-capping, but that was just your standard all's fair in love, war and politics gamesmanship. Hannity has pretty much become his enemy's (Hillary's) greatest asset. Think of the Boston Red Sox fans cheering for the Yankees.
"While the left wing moveon.org media fails to do their job," claims Hannity, "all I am doing is trying to get beyond the candidates bumper stickers and slogans and find out as much as possible about the people who want the most important job in the world."
And he's gone yard, touching them all, not only making the Reverend Jeremiah Wright story an albatross around Obama's neck, but personally delivering the William Ayers debate question to George Stephanopoulus.
"The fact that the media was a full year behind us on the Rev. Wright story, and months behind us on the Ayers story speaks for itself, " claims Hannity. "Are the American people better off when they know more or less about the candidates?"
Democrats may think that Hillary Clinton's continued run for the big prize may be just a waste of time, Sean Hannity Bonds knows that it ain't over until it's over...and that means, if not a Hillary win, a battle-scarred Obama, having to go extra-innings in the Democratic playoff, will be limping into the November World Series with his best hitters and pitchers on the injured list.
It seems like only yesterday that conservative talk radio did everything it could to knock John McCain out of the race, and Hillary Clinton's loss was a forgone conclusion. Today, if Pennsylvania is any indication and Sean Hannity swinging the lumber, January may mean a walk off grand slam for right wing talk and McCain.
Look, I'm a confirmed, card-carrying liberal who's probably filled more column space with anti -right wing radio rants - including royally slamming Hannity - than anyone else on the literary planet, so don't take this as in no way am I condoning Hannity's tact. But I'm also a Philadelphia 76ers fan. And as much as I remember hating Larry Bird when the Celtics came into town, there's no doubt I would have loved having him on my team. I might not be happy with his approach, but winning the championship and watching the victory parade sure beats the hell out of whining "wait till next year (four years)."
Steve Young is an award-winning TV writer and author of Great Failures of the Extremely Successful www.greatfailure.com