“When within yourself you find the road, the right road will open.” - Dejan Stojanovic, poet, essayist.
If 2016 taught me anything, it was to pay attention to what life is trying to tell me. If you don’t pay attention it will knock you over with the signs. We all have ups and downs in our lives and some people feel that they just happen. But the ups and downs contain lessons. What is the universe trying to tell you when you succeed? What is the lesson in your failures? If we do not learn from our failures, we are destined to repeat the same mistakes over and over.
At the end of each year, I try to take advantage of the quiet and stillness to look for patterns of behaviour in my life that led me to joy or pain. I know that if I stop to analyze those patterns, and face the uncomfortable moments and the joyful moments, then maybe I can make some positive changes in the New Year. If you want 2017 to look different from 2016, you have to sit down and reflect on what the patterns in your life are trying to tell you. Here are some of the lessons that 2016 taught me. These lessons also helped me to determine what my New Year’s resolution will be. Maybe you will find something that resonates in your life!
“What you allow is what will continue.” - Unknown
Stand up for yourself
I like to pick my battles and I only fight for what I am passionate about. I make a conscious choice to be kind to everyone and I will let things go if I do not think it is worth creating an issue over. This year, I noticed that people felt they could take advantage of my kindness, especially in my personal life. It forced me to stand up for myself more and make my voice heard. I am polite and respectful but I speak my heart. This year, I was constantly reminded of this anonymous quote: “Don't ever mistake my silence for ignorance, my calmness for acceptance, or my kindness for weakness.” If we do not stand up for ourselves, no one else will. The greatest lesson for me was that people can’t bully me into submission to further their own agenda - I was not going to tolerate selfish behaviour so I put a stop to it immediately. The people that are in my life now are here because of mutual respect and love - not control.
“I realize there’s something incredibly honest about trees in winter, how they’re experts at letting things go.” -Jeffrey McDaniel, poet.
Let go of the past
Many of us hang on to relationships and routines long past their expiry date. We cling to the past and avoid trying new things, meeting new people. Fear of change or fear of failure and fear of pain keeps us from letting go. I know I tend to do this. But this year I stopped. I walked away from things that didn't feel right anymore, ended relationships that didn’t feed my soul. And it was liberating and scary! But once I shed those parts of my past that weren’t working anymore, I felt it in my body. I walked lighter. I breathed more deeply. I was more present. Only when you let go of the past can you truly shape your future.
“All change is hard at first, messy in the middle and gorgeous at the end.” – Robin Sharma
Be open to change
I am a creature of habit. I eat the same food, I order from the same places, I tend to travel to the same destinations and listen to the same music. When you are a creature of habit sometimes you create your own restrictions. This past year I broke through a lot of those self-imposed constraints. Once I decided to commit to change, change appeared in every aspect of my life. I traveled to new places. I rode a motorcycle for the first time. I rode a horse for the first time! I tried something new almost every single day. Think about how big the world is. My world of habits had gotten so small. If I had not been open to change, I would have missed out on the wonderful experience of trying something new and loving it.
All of the lessons that 2016 taught me about change, about letting go and standing up for myself have led to my New Year’s resolution, which is simply to prioritize happiness in 2017.
"Happiness is a journey, not a destination." – Ben Sweetland, author
Decide to be happy in the New Year
For me, the big takeaway from 2016 was the importance of happiness. I usually have big, elaborate New Year’s resolutions. My past New Year’s posts have contained three or four major goals and detailed plans for achieving them. This year, I have simplified it all. Whenever anyone asks me my New Year’s resolution, I just say, “Happiness.” I am making a concerted effort to make decisions that will simply just make me happy - happiness will act as my compass to gauge the direction for my choices in 2017. I want to say “YES!” to everything that feels happy. And I plan to turn down any opportunities that don’t feel like they will bring me joy. This resolution will allow me to be more present - to experience happiness in the moment and not to spend all my time thinking and wishing about what could have been or what should be.
Wishing each of you peace, love and joy in 2017 and the courage to look at your life’s patterns, make positive changes and be happy!
How has your year been? Any big lessons? What is your New Year’s resolution? Tweet me @NatashaNKPR or comment below.
Happy New Year!
xo Natasha