The following conversation took place at a screenwriter’s meeting with a film executive. The title of the film project was “The Man Who Would Be King.”
Writer: We fade in and over the opening credits we hear David Bowie sing… The lyrics:
This is not America, sha la la la la
A little piece of you
The little peace in me
Will die, this is not a miracle
For this is not America
Executive: Okay, good song to open. So, now you’ve got this very wealthy man who’s going to run for President, and he has all the trappings of a king.
Writer: Yes. He lives in a tower, he has a big plane and he puts his name on it… a helicopter, has his name on it… he puts his name on a lot of things. He likes seeing his name.
Executive: All right, so basically it’s just another wealthy guy running for President. Like Romney.
Writer: No. You don’t get it. Romney didn’t act like a king. He was just wealthy. In fact, he sort of tried to hide his wealth. This guy, our guy, exploits the idea that he’s wealthy. That’s the angle I’m going for! So when he runs to become President of the United States, he carries forth this attitude that, “I am the King! I am so wealthy that I can pay for my own campaign!” That’s how bold he is. See what I’m saying?
Executive: How does he act like a king? What am I missing here?
Writer: Okay, when he’s in the primaries, that’s where our story begins. He’ll complain that he’s not being treated fairly. And if he’s not being treated fairly, he won’t even attend the debate. There’s a great scene – after one of the debates, he’ll say: “I wasn’t being treated fairly, and if this person is ever the moderator again, I’ll never show up.” Of course, nobody believes him. And when one of the networks decides to use that person again, our guy doesn’t show up! He projects strength, he is basically saying: “I am above the system.” He is saying: “I am a special person, and I don’t play by your rules.” Do you get it? That’s the hook! The people love it! He has the arrogance of a king! What makes him so appealing is he blatantly says, “I’m not playing by your rules.” We bring up the David Bowie song once again, and then we hear these lyrics:
Blossom fails to bloom this season,
Promise not to stare,
Too long
This is not America
For this is not the miracle
Executive: To me the song gets in the way. But what I don’t understand is why that makes him popular.
Writer: Look, audiences have always loved stories about the English monarchy. Henry the VIII, he does what he wants, he defies the Pope because he wants to remarry… He defies the Pope! Henry the VIII even establishes the Church of England so that he can marry another woman… We love defiance! We love the English monarchy! You have to remember at the beginning of the Revolutionary War, the country was split. Half wanted to remain under the crown. So we’ve got a soft spot for kings and royalty. In the War of 1812 the English burned the White House down, and we still maintained good relations afterwards. Look at Maryland – they’ve got streets called King George Street, they’ve got Prince George’s county, and Prince George, by the way, wasn’t even a British monarch. He was from Denmark and married Queen Anne, and they still named a county after him-
Executive: Okay, I get it, I get it.
Writer: And what he does with the press, our free press, is really cool. Anytime they get tough with him, he threatens them and says, “If I become President, I’m going to pass tougher laws against freedom of speech.” When you’re the King, you don’t back down. And our guy has to maintain his King attitude. One thing a King never has to do is to explain what he just said. If there’s a misunderstanding, it’s your fault, not his fault. The King must never ever apologize. The King is never sorry. And if the King changes his position from one day to the next, it should be viewed as simply a new policy.
When it’s common practice to have your income tax looked at… the King doesn’t give in to that common request. Medical records? He says, “I’ll show what I want to show!” He’s the king! And he’s charming about it. “Look how high my testosterone numbers are!” He laughs… And audiences love him for it. Think of Camelot, back in the 1960s, big Broadway show!
Executive: Yes, but that was the lofty ideals of King Arthur.
Writer: Right! And this is the dark side. Without music.
Executive: The dark side?
Writer: Our guy talks the lofty ideals. In some ways, he’s as naïve as King Arthur in that musical. When Guinevere says: “What do the simple folk do?” King Arthur responds:
“I have been informed by those who know them well
They find relief in quite a clever way
When they’re sorely pressed, they whistle for a spell
And whistling seems to brighten up their day
And that’s what simple folk do
So they say”
You see our King has never really been among the common people, either, and he makes no effort to fit in with them. That’s what makes him so attractive. In the past, politicians tried to be a man of the people. Not our guy. Our guy believes, “you’re not as good as I am, but I’ll lead the way.”
Executive: But when you cut together the sizzle reel here, we still have a billionaire running for President. Let’s say Mike Bloomberg…
Writer: You’re still missing the point. Bloomberg was a three time Mayor of New York City.
Executive: Yeah, and a billionaire.
Writer: Well, Bloomberg just gave $300 million dollars to Johns Hopkins University for a public health program. Our guy would never do anything like that! The King doesn’t give away money! The King keeps collecting money. In a democracy, you work your way up to become a President. You were a former Senator, a Congressperson, but our guy doesn’t do that. Our guy just wants to be the King. So here’s the clincher. He’s elected President of the United States. At his inauguration, after he’s sworn in, he steps forward to the podium and uses the great Mel Brooks line: “It’s good to be the King.” We end on a big laugh, and we fade to black.
Before You Go
