The More Parents Talk To Teens About Sex, The Safer Their Sex Will Be

There's no time like the present to start this ongoing conversation.
Gone Wild via Getty Images

By Kathryn Doyle

(Reuters Health) - Talking about sex with parents, especially moms, can influence teen behavior including condom use, according to a new review.

But while talks with parents may be one important factor in helping youth make safer choices, it is clearly not the only factor, because the link between parent communication and teen sexual behavior was relatively small, said lead author Laura Widman of North Carolina State University in Raleigh.

Parents could talk about other topics that impact risky sexual choices, such as substance use, peer pressure, and a lack of communication about safety between dating partners prior to engaging in sex, Widman told Reuters Health by email.

The review included 52 studies with more than 25,000 teens, all including teen reports of communication with one or both parents and measures of safer sex behavior.

Teens who reported having these conversations with their parents also tended to exhibit safer sexbehavior and were more likely to use condoms or other contraception. The effect was strongest for girls and for teens who spoke to their mothers, specifically.

There were no significant differences based on the topics parents discussed with their teens, Widman and colleagues reported in JAMA Pediatrics.

“We know that parents tend to communicate more frequently with girls than with boys,” Widman said. “We also know that the messages parents share are more likely to stress the negative consequences of sexual activity, like pregnancy, when they talk with their daughters.”

Parents may need to increase how often they talk with their sons about sex and change the content of the messages surrounding sex that they communicate to boys, she said.

Most teen sex education programs are aimed directly at the adolescent, including posting information and making condoms available in proximity to them, said Dr. Vincent Guilamo-Ramos of New York University, who coauthored an editorial published with the new results.

“Those are all terrific and we should keep doing them,” but parents matter, too, he told Reuters Health by email.

Other studies have found that parents can help delay teen sexual debut, and this review now supports an influence on contraceptive use as well, he said.

“We want to get parents engaged and communicating on these issues,” Guilamo-Ramos said.

Adolescents account for a quarter of sexually active individuals but have half of all sexually transmitted infections, and there are still 600,000 teen pregnancies in the U.S. per year, he noted.

Often parents underestimate when their kids are having sex, believing other kids are sexually active, but not their own, he said. Sex talks should begin early around age 11 or 12, and should stress that it is better to wait, he said.

“A true family based approach is one where parents are getting the information and they decide how to deliver it, as opposed to a one size fits all curriculum,” Guilamo-Ramos said.

Parents should stress that the positive things teens hope to gain from sex, like more closeness with a partner, feeling popular or mature, are false expectations, and do not outweigh the dangers of teen pregnancy or STDs, he said.

“Many parents are fearful that if they bring the topic up, teens will initiate sexually,” but the opposite is true, he said.

“Youth who are not able to talk with their partners about topics like sexual limits, condoms, and STDs are much more likely to engage in risky sex,” Widman said. “When parents model how to have open and honest conversations about sex with their teens, they can help teens learn how to have similar conversations with their dating partners.”

SOURCE: http://bit.ly/1adWrco JAMA Pediatrics, online November 2, 2015.

Also on HuffPost:

Goodwill Games
rez-art/Thinkstock
"There's nothing wrong with sometimes being intimate just to please your partner, or vice versa. In successful long-term relationships, people accommodate each other. You might sit through an action film when you'd rather see a drama. Your partner may want steak but join you for sushi. We do this for each other out of love -- the joy of making someone you care for happy. Why should sex be any different?" -- Marta Meana, PhD, professor of psychology at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas
Can You Expand on That?
SrdjanPav/Thinkstock
"When a woman client says, 'I don't want to have sex, I want to make love,' I say, 'What exactly are you asking for? Eye contact? Foreplay? Being told "I love you"?' So often when couples talk to each other, they're not using behavioral terms—they're saying things like 'I want more excitement.' But each person has a very idiosyncratic understanding of what those words mean, so you have to spell out to your partner what you need and want." -- Michele Weiner-Davis, marriage therapist in Boulder, Colorado and author of The Sex-Starved Marriage
May the Force Be With You
YuriF via Getty Images
"Sexual energy is a life-force, and even if you're not in a relationship, it's important to harness that creative energy by bringing yourself sexual pleasure. In that state of being, you have a warmth and a vitality that are more likely to attract a partner; if you're looking for one. People who are connected to that life-force exude a radiance that others can feel." -- Kim Anami, Bali-based holistic sex and relationship coach
If You Need to Be Ready in Five
SrdjanPav/Thinkstock
"This is drawn from an ancient Taoist technique: Rest your awareness gently on your clitoris. Breathe slowly. Imagine you're breathing through your vagina. Suddenly, that area will become alive -- you'll feel a spark and a stirring that will grow until you feel strongly aroused." -- Brandy Engler, L.A. sex therapist and author of The Women on My Couch
It's Your Party
moodboard/Thinkstock
"Women should take control of their own satisfaction. Some resist the idea because society tells us that the right partner will know just what to do, or that love always leads to good sex. But those ideas discount the power of a woman's sexuality because they put pleasure in someone else's hands. Be selfish! Prioritize your own erotic needs." -- Madeleine Castellanos, MD, New York City sex therapist and author of Wanting to Want

Popular in the Community

Close

HuffPost Shopping’s Best Finds

MORE IN LIFE