The Morning After...

There's a Boxer in my neighborhood who hasn't smiled since McCain chose Palin as his running mate.
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I know what you're thinking. You're thinking about taking November 5th off from work so that you can recover from an overnight marathon of cable news, a night of either celebratory binge drinking or a night of weeping like a child.

Do it.

Really, the emotional toll this election is taking on even my least political acquaintances is startling. I know people who've started grinding their teeth who never had that problem prior to the Democratic primaries. I have a harder time falling asleep. Even dogs seem to be sensing it; there's a Boxer in my neighborhood who hasn't smiled since McCain chose Palin as his running mate.

I recently heard about an individual who sent his aunt an email about why she should vote Obama, to which the aunt replied "Too bad I early voted for McCain today." I wonder if it'll be "that one" whose Thanksgiving dinner invitation gets lost in the mail this year.

Depending on the outcome, you will be overcome with glee or pondering a move to somewhere far, far away (I hear Micronesia is lovely this time of year). But your emotional reaction won't be hinged on the moment of victory or loss; it'll be an unleashing of more than a year of pent-up hope, disappointment, and frustration. You'll probably need a hug, regardless of whether your guy wins or loses.

Take the day off. Watch some "Jon & Kate Plus Eight" reruns or play some Wii bowling. The last thing you want to do is sit in an office where half of your coworkers will be celebrating and the other half muttering to themselves and each other about the apocalypse.

Regardless of the outcome, we will all need a detox. So call in sick on November 5... you may not even have to fake it.

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