John Hodgman is a humorist, actor, and bestselling author of the comedic almanacs More Information Than You Require and The Areas of My Expertise. He's also known for his contributions to The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, and for playing the long-suffering foil to Justin Long in Apple's iconic Get a Mac commercials. We recently caught up by phone to discuss his future writing projects and his supporting role in the new black comedy Treatment. Then the conversation veered off topic a bit. My bad.
STEVEN SHEHORI: Treatment is a film about rehab and co-dependency, with a little Hollywood tossed in for good measure. How would you describe the premise and your role within it?
JOHN HODGMAN: I play the older brother of a lost soul wannabe filmmaker who comes to me to finance his latest adventure. He needs 15 thousand dollars to enter a high-end rehab facility with the hopes of wooing a Charlie Sheen-type actor into starring in his movie. At which point things go a bit astray and he ends up --
SS: I hear a bunch of stuff going on in the background. Where are you right now?
JH: I'm out and about in New York City.
SS: Doing what, window shopping?
JH: Well, before our conversation started, I was actually debating what it would mean for my soul if I were to spend the rest of the day looking at Game of Thrones costumes at the HBO Store.
SS: Do they sell actual chain mail there? Wait, was there chain mail back in Game of Thrones times?
JH: Yes. Although leather mail was a lot more common than chain mail. And plate mail, of course, was only affordable to the highest of nobles in the country of Westeros.
SS: Westeros?
JH: You don't seem to know a lot about Game of Thrones, Steven. It leads me to wonder what you're doing with your life.
SS: My understanding is, it's sort of like Lord of the Rings, if Lord of the Rings were written by a guy who only kind of looked like Tolkien, instead of completely 100% looking like Tolkien.
JH: Yes, George R.R. Martin. Now let me make it clear that I think he's an absolutely brilliant writer in any genre. But I see what you mean, he does sort of look like a deranged ship captain, or somebody who's doing George R.R. Martin cosplay at DragonCon... Also, he has a neck beard.
SS: I'm wondering if the popularity of the Game of Thrones fantasy novels -- and now the TV series -- will lead to a resurgence of the neck beard in popular culture.
JH: Well, I will say this: the three greatest neck beards in American history belong to Henry Thoreau, George R.R. Martin, and five months from now, John Hodgman.
SS: You're making a commitment to starting up a neck beard as of today?
JH: I have the capability. You may not know this, but I've recently grown a mustache.
SS: I follow TMZ, John -- I'm well aware.
JH: It's simply that every now and then a man needs to check in with his follicles to make sure everything is functioning properly.
SS: So you claim. Although some might argue your decision is a reaction to the increasing number of people who've been saying, "There's no way writer/actor John Hodgman could ever, under any situation, grow a mustache."
JH: Oh... I didn't know there was such a movement out there. Online, I'm assuming?
SS: It's a small but vocal community.
JH: Most people presume my mustache is not real because it's much darker than my regular hair. My regular 'top head' hair, as I refer to it. But believe me, the mustache is real, it's dark, it's menacing, and it makes people nervous.
SS: Do you feel your newly-grown facial hair might facilitate your landing a cameo in Game of Thrones?
JH: I don't think this mustache could make it any clearer to HBO and the internet that I need to be part of that series as soon as possible.
The 'Treatment' world premiere was just held at the Tribeca Film Festival, with a wider release date expected soon.