I think we all have some type of stereotype in the back of our mind of what the perfect family is. Whatever that ideal may be, you hold it near and dear to you.
See, growing up I had the “perfect” family. It was my mom and my dad and then their two little girls (my sister and me). That’s what I once thought was the flawless family.
But then my worst nightmare became a reality (sorry mom, I know you hate to hear that), my parents got divorced. At first, it was horrible, the worst news I could have ever imagined. Like any bratty teenager, I thought my life was over.
Now, flash forward a few years and I couldn’t imagine my world any differently. My family consists of my mom, my sister, and of course, me. For a while it was us girls, but now we’ve added more to the family. To our crew we added my step dad and my two step brothers. To be honest, I hate the term “step brothers” and usually just refer to them as my brothers, even though they don’t love the idea of now having sisters that are girly-girls, sorry guys.
Anyway, this is my new family and I couldn’t be anymore grateful that God proved me wrong about my dream life and gave me this instead because trust me, I am one lucky girl.
But what I think slipped under my radar for way too long of time is how difficult it is to take the role of a “step parent”. I was so caught up in my new life and the ups, but mostly downs of my day to day. I didn’t really pay attention to the other side of things, specifically my step-dad.
Let me clarify one thing: my step dad is one of my best friends. He makes me laugh until I cry, helps me with my car repairs, gives me a shoulder to cry on when boys break my heart, and teaches me what I want to one day have in a husband.
But let’s be real, it can’t be easy to not only find someone you love, but then learn they have children you will one day have to call family. It’s awkward and uncomfortable when your significant other tries to force you to have a relationship with their children, but you know it has to happen if you want that relationship to continue.
So you have to have dinners all together, you have to smile and laugh as if you’re enjoying every minute. You have to buy them Christmas and birthday gifts, attend graduations, and give them money, of course.
What you don’t have to do is become another parent to them. You don’t have to treat them as one of your own. You don’t have to stand by them every step of the way through life.
So, shout out to all those step parents out there who deserve the world for taking their “step”, nah screw that, their CHILDREN and treating them as their own.
Take it from a girl who has that, it means the world and you make us feel like everything is okay. You let us know that living a “normal” and “perfect” life is boring. You show us that maybe it didn’t work out the first time but true love is out there and you shouldn’t give up until you find that one special person.
You are appreciated and you are recognized, trust me.
And to those children out there who think their world is ending because their “perfect” life is over, I promise something better is in store for you.