The Rumors of My Twittercide Have Not Been Greatly Exaggerated

Hi all. So, yeh. It's true. I killed @Noompsydahling. Killed the shit out of her and good riddance. Why am I being so mean about it? Well, that's just it. That's the way of Twitter, I have come to find. Mean is cool. Insensitive is cool. Cold is cool.
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Hi all. So, yeh. It's true. I killed @Noompsydahling. Killed the shit out of her and good riddance. Why am I being so mean about it? Well, that's just it. That's the way of Twitter, I have come to find. Mean is cool. Insensitive is cool. Cold is cool. It's a land where the insecurities of everyday people show themselves behind the protection of cartoon avatars and anonymous monikers, where regular everyday people spew their vitriol and perversion with not a sniff of accountability. If anything, it's done for fake hearts that have somehow come to replace real ones. People can lose their humanity completely in a place like that. In my time there, I've seen people say horrible things to young kids. I've seen people make jokes about suicide, or make light of a complete stranger's appearance or emotional suffering as if it were fodder for a quippy one-liner. And here I was trying to do some good. Spread love and all. Maybe some joy?

I'm not cut out for it.

Hashtag games were funny and I had a good run of it. I appreciate what the gaming community did for me and made some lifelong friends while making puns and saying silly things about superheroes. But did you know this tidbit about Twitter? Hashtaggers are the nerds? They get made fun of relentlessly. So do inspirational tweeters because F you jerk for trying to be nice!

God forbid! Oh yeh. Wait. Don't talk about God either. You won't be cool.

It took me a long time to see that the majority of Twitterlebrities are just people who hate their lives as much as everyone else does. They just hide in their phones. They're not smarter or funnier than anyone you'd meet in real life, but they wouldn't know it because they are too busy pretending real life doesn't exist. What's more, the Twittersphere is a political Thunderdome with more working pieces than a Rube Goldberg machine. There are all types of secret rooms and private "in confidence" discussions over tweet brands and personas. PERSONAS, for Pete's sake! People craft online personalities and wage war with other "names" that put the old East Coast/West Coast rivalry to shame. And there are alliances abound like it's some kind of giant washed-out idiotic reality TV show. The people sucked into the rabbit hole don't come out. They love it all like it's life blood. The fix of the anonymous adoration of complete strangers outweighs any concept of real human emotion. Digital hearts and retweets become some weird status currency that defines whether a user is worthy of attention or should be discarded without a second glance like garbage. I've seen it happen for myself. And again.

I'm not cut out for it.

There are good people on Twitter, sure, the odd ducks who come from an authentic place. But their presence isn't enough for me anymore. There are too many tragic wannabe villains playing heartless for the rush only complete strangers can provide. I've seen way too many people being the most horrible version of themselves possible. And I know enough horrible things in real life.

I'm not cut out for it.

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