Yes, I know it is the holiday season and we are all supposed to be in that blissful, "everything and everyone is wonderful" mindset.
But I need to fill you in on the shocking results from the Working Moms Only survey. With all of the current harassment stories, it reminded me of a very personal and disturbing story from my friend Janet, who was hit on at her company holiday party by a co-worker.
And not only did this "prince charming" know she's married, but he is married as well!
I have always adopted the philosophy that knowledge is power. If you do not know a problem exists - you cannot solve it.
Because of the obvious anguish Janet was in, I needed to know just how prevalent these kinds of situations are.
Well my friends - it is not just prevalent, it is a freakin' epidemic!
I could not believe my eyes when I saw that 81% of the Working Moms Only community had been hit on by a co-worker at a company holiday party.
You heard me right - 81%!
And the hits keep coming . . .
Here are the results in their entirety:
After I picked my chin up from off the ground, I promptly started calling my network of women friends and current and former colleagues.
I explained why I was calling and proceeded to ask them the same questions that were in the survey.
Many of them said that they had seen it in last week's issue and were among the 81% that already took the survey.
I did however, dig a little deeper about advice they would give to women who have already been through this situation as well as advice on how to avoid it.
With that, coupled with the hundreds of responses received, I have compiled the best advice that I can offer.
SEVEN MUST DO'S
- Avoid drinking too much. Limit your intake to no more than 2 drinks. Not only will you be more aware of your surroundings, but you will pick up on signs that something uncomfortable may occur.
- Don't spend too much time talking to one person, or any male colleague, who has been drinking too much.
- If you do not have a date, bring a friend or relative with you. We just had our company party last week and many women and men brought a sibling; one even brought her mom.
- Always remain in a group setting and do not go off alone with anyone, even if you know this person very well. Remember, Janet had been working with Bob for well over a year.
- Avoid getting into deep personal stories with co-workers.
- If you find yourself in an uncomfortable situation, be direct and firm in your un-wanting of their advancements, even if this person is your supervisor and even if this causes a scene.
- Should this happen to you, report the incident immediately to the HR department.
There are strict laws that protect us from these kinds of situations. It does not matter if this person is your supervisor or not.
One of the saddest parts of this survey is that 79% of women who had this happen to them DID NOT report the incident.
We cannot allow this to continue. Do we really want to send our daughters out to a work force where this is permitted?
Hell no!
We have the power to change this - silence is NOT the answer.