The Thing About Relationship Checklists...

Ladies and gentlemen, we’re all guilty of creating mental relationship checklists of qualities we look for in the "perfect" partner, which is really a figment of our imagination. I’ve mainly encountered women who dream about meeting that cliché tall, dark and handsome prince. I’ve been with that guy, and let me tell you… it wasn’t that great. 

Our high expectations can easily get in the way of our happiness and I think it’s time to let go of those limiting lists and follow our hearts instead! Yes, it feels great to know what you want out of a partner, but there’s a fine line between idealizing and believing what’s actually real.

So for a second, imagine you meet the person of your dreams. He or she possesses every quality on your wish list; perhaps a master chef or a nature junkie. That’s all swell, but then what? Romantic hikes and candlelit dinners can only go so far and won’t guarantee a “happily ever after." The truth of the matter is that you must follow your heart and everything will fall into place. Your partner will fulfill you more than you could ever imagine. It’s not the list that will bring you happiness; only the heart knows what’s right. But learning to trust it can be hard because we’re taught to listen what seems most logical. Sometimes, the heart doesn’t make sense because you must wholly trust your feelings to understand it. People need security, which can be found in answers. The heart won’t reveal why it’s beneficial to trust it right off the bat, but later on.

Most people find it easier to follow the heart by accepting the idea that what’s meant for you will come your way. You'll feel it because it awakens you emotionally. Denying the heart when it speaks is denying yourself, and that’s the ego at work. It acts as a security blanket, which can be isolating. Life is all about letting love flow in; your ego can make you “love-resistant” and dash the possibility of feeling strongly connected to others. It wants to be untouchable and in control, so it’s understandably difficult to give in to what your heart is trying to communicate and veer away from practicality.

For happiness to reach you, be open to what creates good energy within. Ask yourself what makes you feel good! Opening up takes guts because you need to be tough and secure on the inside to trust that your heart is always right. In addition to establishing that faith, learn to love yourself. The more you love you, the stronger the heart, and the louder it speaks! 

A while back, I read a book called Life After Death, which focuses on near-death experiences. What caught my attention were the two questions asked when you "cross over": firstly, Who did you love, and secondly, what have you learned? To me, that says a lot about what’s really important in life. Don’t hold back...your heart is your guide and will lead you along a journey of enrichment. That relationship checklist will slip away if you accept positivity as the dominant factor in your judgment because at the end of the day, the goal is to find someone who loves and cares deeply—not someone who meets a long list of materialistic requirements.

Remember: love is real, now and forever.

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