President Barack Obama is expected to make a decision on a replacement for retiring Supreme Court Justice John Paul Stevens any day now. And that "any day now" is proving to be unacceptable to your White House Press Corps, who apparently spend a few minutes each day futilely attempting to trick White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs into spilling details that he's never, ever going to reveal, not ever.
So, for your amusement, here's today's performance of "I Know This Is Probably Pointless But I'll Do It Anyway," a Beckettian rumination on futility in one act.
[Lights up on the White House Briefing Room, a briefing already in progress.]
Q I know this is probably pointless but I'll do it anyway -- Supreme Court.
MR. GIBBS: Supreme Court -- all right, I was waiting. How many questions did that take?
Q Yes, well, anything? (Laughter.)
MR. GIBBS: You go about 16 blocks and you hang a right, and you --
Q You mean you can't go in the front?
MR. GIBBS: I know. I know.
Q Is tomorrow a possibility?
MR. GIBBS: Every day is a possibility.
Q Today is a possibility?
Q We have to change your frequency. (Laughter.)
MR. GIBBS: I would say -- that was good. I would say less today given the time that's elapsed.
Q The weekend?
Q Let's just say Monday.
Q The weekend?
Q You're not ruling it out?
MR. GIBBS: Every day is a possibility.
Q You won't rule out this week?
MR. GIBBS: I'm not going to rule out -- I'm not going to rule out anything.
Q It could be happening right now, for all we know.
MR. GIBBS: You didn't know? That would be quite the diversion, wouldn't it?
Q Is Vice President Biden's attendance mandatory at the announcement?
MR. GIBBS: No.
Q Would the administration consider --
MR. GIBBS: It would still be a big deal. (Laughter.)
Q What kind of deal? (Laughter.)
Q A very big deal.
MR. GIBBS: How loud is the static? That's -- go ahead.
Q Why would be a big deal?
MR. GIBBS: Nice try.
[Fin.]
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