"Every time a friend of mine succeeds, a small part of me dies" -Gore Vidal
'It' happens in all walks of life and those of us in the arts, actors, artists, composers and writers, are not exempt from having felt 'it.' We have all experienced 'it' a few times in our careers. 'It' is a human trait which no one likes to admit having felt.
So what exactly is 'it?' It's the green-eyed monster and it is alive and well. As stated it hits all walks of life but it can be especially hard on creative people. People who hope to make their living on their dreams and creative bent can be hard-pressed to avoid 'it.'
"Oh my God! He got a book deal with more than a $7,000 advance! How is that even possible? My book is better than his!"
"What do you mean a book tour? Like mine, the virtual one I do? No? You mean a real travel one? That's not fair."
"They paid for her ticket to the ALA (American Library Association)? How did she swing that?"
"He got the Pulitzer Prize for that ridiculous piece of work? Seriously?"
The Green-Eyed Monster bites and bites hard. I get it. You're an author, you write because it is what you want to, need to, not to mention, have to do. You want to have your work noticed and praised.
All right, everyone wants to be recognized for working hard, receiving accolades, and for being a great writer. The need to feel successful in your field is strong, at times overwhelming. I get it because I feel it too. I thank my lucky stars for the amount of success I do have and yet...even those with some type of success get bitten by ol'Green-Eyed once in a while. It's what I call the "want factor"; you want that recognition of something on which you've lavished time, creative energy, blood, sweat, and tears!
And while it might seem petty to be jealous of someone else, especially when you, yourself, have had success in this field, it happens. I've met very, very few writers who haven't envied their author-peers, at least occasionally. By the way jealousy is simply a human emotion, a gut-reaction; you're not a mean person if you feel jealousy, you're human.
We're always told, those of us in the arts, that we should measure success by self, our own self. Your success should come from how you feel about your work because, we are told that, if you're looking for outside indicators of success, you never going to stop looking. It will never be enough. One New York Times appearance? Just one? A translation of your book into another language? Why not three languages? One Book Award? That's it?
Are you getting the picture?
Measuring success can be hard when you want to base it solely on literary awards, monetary achievement, (your advance, book sales, paid workshops, etc.), book lists, and book readings to which you've been invited. Success! Shouldn't we have it too?
Yes, but... think about this: It pays to remember that success, as much as we'd like to have it ourselves, comes with its own uncomfortable price. Writers who have had literary success can't rest on their last book laurels. Just the same as all authors, they will wake up every single day and face the computer screen. However unlike us their accolades dictate that they must prove their literary success by creating another best-seller. The literary world expects them to achieve that level of success again and again. And that world is harsh and dismissive if the book isn't on par with the last best-seller.
I know that even that thought won't stop the nibbling bite of the green-eyed monster so maybe we need to do something that will better us as writers on our road to success. We all know that we're not the same neophyte writer we used to be. We've learned along the way. We need to keep learning.
Before you brush off another writer's success as simply "dumb luck" take a good hard look at the factors contributing to her or his success. You may see something useful that will help you achieve your own goals. Chances are good they did something different than you are currently doing and many times it is in publicity and marketing. Somehow they're getting their name out there in a better way.
Envy can be the spur to ambition but remember that like all emotions, jealousy can eventually become very self-draining. As best-selling author Marcus Buckingham said, "We can never achieve goals that envy sets for us."
Rewrite, rework, and remake your thinking as an author and understand that, just as you can't write another person's book, the best author in the world can't write yours. Keep writing and keep the Green-eyed Monster in it's place.
Happy Writing!
Read the adventures of Kristen Houghton's own popular sleuth in the A Cate Harlow Private Investigation series available at all book venues
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