Of course, it is natural to be curious when a moving truck rolls in to your neighborhood. This week, Beth Hallstrom, contributing writer to the RaiseAChild “Let Love Define Family®” series for Huffington Post Queer Voices, learned all about the profound effect new next door neighbors had on the lives of Wellington, FL residents Dana Thompson and Mark Wootton.
“Having kids was never high on our list,” Dana explained. “Well, at least not until James and Henry moved in next door with their son. We became good friends. They also made us realize, ‘our neighbors had a child, all our siblings have kids, maybe we should have kids?’”
New neighbors James and Henry Parnell-Roy and their infant son, Jordan, turned out to be subtle yet very effective recruiters for children of the foster care system.
“They showed us that fostering and adoption gives us the opportunity to make life better for children. We decided that’s what we were going to do,” Dana said.
Dana, 52, is the owner of a company that provides physicians with medical coding and billing. He was in Atlanta in 2005 visiting a client when he happened to meet 35-year old Mark, who was in town visiting friends.
“We actually met online. We started talking and found out we had so much in common, such as we were both raised in central Florida. A month later, he moved in and we’ve been together ever since. We aren’t married (yet), but we love each other and are dedicated to each other and we both want the best for our son,” Dana said.
With coaching from James and Henry, Dana and Mark took the necessary foster-to-adopt training. They readied their home and waited for the phone to ring. They enrolled in the foster-to-adopt program, but a detour from that plan ensured Dana and Mark had the opportunity to make life better for some other children first.
Kids in Distress, the agency that trained Dana and Mark, soon called about three brothers, ages 5-9, who needed a temporary foster home but who would eventually be reunited with their mother.
“It was amazing because Mark fell into a routine right away of getting them up and having breakfast, studying, playtime, and bedtime. It was so easy and, for a while, we were a family of five,” Dana recalled.
The boys came to Dana and Mark in October, 2013 and stayed until June, 2014. On the day they moved in, Chase was born. “We were definitely going to be fathers to a son - we just didn’t know it yet,” Dana wryly said.
Two months later Kids in Distress called once again with a plea for Dana and Mark to take in a baby boy who needed an immediate foster home placement. Born prematurely, Chase had respiratory issues and digestive problems.
“He had terrible gastroesophageal reflux disease (GERD) and threw up constantly… mostly on me,” Dana said with a chuckle. “But he’s completely outgrown those issues and today, he’s fine.
“Of course we immediately agreed. We had always wanted a baby who could eventually be adopted after a time in foster care. Even at two months, he was so tiny. I could hold him in the palm of my hand.
“We were ecstatic, but we knew there would be ups and down. By his first birthday, he was ours,” Mark said with pride.
While the adoption of Chase was proceeding and before the judge struck his gavel to officially declare Chase Alexander Thompson-Wootton was his fathers’ son, the trio of brothers were reunited with their mother. She turned her life around and secured a home for her family.
Angels James and Henry weren’t done yet, though. According to Dana, the Parnell-Roys went on a shopping spree for the family and even purchased furniture for the boys’ new home.
As difficult as it was to see the boys go, Dana said he and Mark were happy they could love and protect them during that time of their lives. The men hope they instilled some good qualities in the foster children that they will be able to rely on later in life.
Today, Chase and his best buddies next door neighbors, Jordan and Victor, are happy, healthy boys beginning to explore the world around them and what it has to offer. The older boys attend pre-school together.
“Chase is very well spoken and intelligent. He’s just getting into sports and, now, there is a baseball bat and mitt in the backyard that we practice with every night. That’s my job and it is an indescribable felling of joy,” Dana noted.
“We owe a lot to James and Henry,” Dana mused. “If they hadn’t moved in next door, we would probably not be parents today. They encouraged us, helped us navigate the system and talked us through all the steps. With their guidance, we became Dads.”
Dana said he and Mark are considering adding to their family. In the meantime, they are content, along with neighbors James and Henry, to be enthusiastic promoters of fostering and adoption.
“When we run into people who want to know how our family came to pass, we tell them exactly how it was done. People are basically nice. Their reactions are typically happiness that Chase is loved and in a good home.
“As for the LGBT community, it just proves most of us want the consistency, stability and permanence of a family like anyone else,” Dana said.
“There’s a very strong sense of pride when a child starts growing and basically turning into little versions of you. The love is unexplainable, really. People tell us we made a difference in one little boy’s life, but, you know what? He’s made a bigger difference in ours,” Dana admitted.
Have you considered building a family? RaiseAChild is the nationwide leader in the recruitment and support of LGBT and all prospective parents interested in building families through fostering and adoption to meet the needs of the 415,000 children in the foster care system of the United States. RaiseAChild recruits, educates and nurtures supportive relationships equally with all prospective foster and adoptive parents while partnering with agencies to improve the process of advancing foster children to safe, loving and permanent homes. Take the Next Step to Parenthood at www.RaiseAChild.org or call us at (323) 417-1440.
Join RaiseAChild on Tuesday, October 25, 2016 for our 6th annual RaiseAChild HARVEST fundraiser at Mauro’s Café Fred Segal in Los Angeles, featuring performances by singer-songwriter Inara George; comedian Kira Soltanovich; and actor, comedian, and adoptive father Alec Mapa. Special thanks to presenting sponsor Banc of California and media partner HuffPost Queer Voices.