They're Selfish and You're Giving, What Else Is New

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Anne Cohen Writes

Many people wonder why when we fall in love, we fall in love so hard. We fall in love so hard, and literally put it all out there within ourselves and towards the person that we care for, and wanting nothing more than to be loved back by the person. Sometimes we give, give, and give endlessly to the person that we love, but they never seem to give back.

Give-and-take is essential for all relationships whether romantic, or even within friendships. Relationships should never be one-sided where only one person gives all of the love, all of the affection, or even all of the attention. It’s important to recognize toxic relationships as such that seem one-sided.

Another thing that many of us question at times is why we give so much love to those that show no real emotion or love towards us. Some people claim that they don’t care, and that their motive is pure, and without wanting anything back in return. They claim that this is just how they are as a person, and that they enjoyed giving to others.

Well, here’s a newsflash for that type... You’re selling yourself short, and you’re bound to get hurt eventually, because what you’re basically doing is imploding, and holding back your true feelings. There’s some part of every person that wants to be needed, to feel appreciated, and loved just as much is the next.

It doesn’t matter how giving a person is, or how much they’d like to be considered a giver by those around them. Even if their motive is not wanting to be considered the giving type, but simply wanting to please others, you can’t expect that it won’t weigh you down at some point. No one should give endlessly to someone that shows no gratitude or appreciation for it.

The only sign of appreciation that should be mandatory and shown in return is to display some type of gratitude, or at least, a genuine thank you. But most of all, what would be nice is a little emotion shown back in return. I’m not a fan of empty I love you’s or any form of empty love for that matter. However, when someone is constantly giving to you in any way, you should either not let them give anymore, or reciprocate the love that they’re showing you.

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