Things I've actually thought upon turning 30

Things I've actually thought upon turning 30
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I missed my chance to be young and sexy, because I was young, but never sexy.

I'm two years older than Julia Roberts’ character in My Best Friend's Wedding.

I'm too old to play an ingénue in a movie, which bums me out even though I'm not an actor.

I never did all the stuff people in their 20s do on TV, like staying out until 4 a.m. Or cocaine.

Is my metabolism really worse now? It's hard to tell because I don't eat right or exercise anyway.

I'm too old for gross older men to fantasize about dating me. (And why does that even bother me?)

I'm six years older than my 10th grade math teacher was.

I wish I'd started wearing sunscreen when I was 12 instead of earlier this year.

A 24-year-old just told me she "couldn't believe I was 30." Was that a compliment or an insult?

Will I ever feel my age?

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