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This Is Why Moms Are Always Really Freakin' Exhausted

Time and time again, you will hear moms everywhere complain about how tired they are. It's kind of our "thing."
10/02/2015 10:06am ET | Updated October 2, 2016
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Black woman with headache and playful son in background

Time and time again, you will hear moms everywhere complain about how tired they are. It's kind of our "thing." Non-moms will smile and nod when they hear you complain for the third time in a week that it's a "Venti" kind of morning. They may even commiserate with you and tell you that they "get it." But they don't. Mom-tired is its own special mix of physical, emotional and mental exhaustion. So, why exactly are moms so f*cking exhausted all the time?

  • We have to feed a bunch of people, sometimes from our boobs, like multiple times a day. Every. Damn. Day.

  • We answer the question "why" at least 343 times a day.
  • We have to be nice and socialize with other parents we don't like for the sake of our children. And everyone knows socializing with people is so exhausting.
  • We are constantly grossed out by the fact that at any given moment we can be covered in another tiny human's bodily fluids. Sure, your 10-pound infant is the most adorable thing in the world, but being projectile-pooped-on by that adorable thing is gag-worthy every time.
  • We are constantly vacuuming Cheerios and scraping fruit snacks from our car floor mats.
  • We spend an hour and a half looking for a tiny My Little Pony figurine that our kid swore was not in their backpack. Then we watch our kid take a nap while we continue searching and then finally find the pony... in the f*cking backpack.
  • We hunt monsters out from their hiding spaces in closets and under beds in the wee hours of the night.
  • We have to sprint through the grocery store last-minute when we inevitably forget it was our day to be "snack mom."
  • We have to jump up and down with excitement about the questionable arts and crafts projects brought home from preschool. Yes, I totally see how that brown squiggle line and purple circle is an elephant dancing in the rain.
  • We are always chauffeuring kids around to back-to-back activities and playdates that they may or may not even want to go to.
  • We have to teach tiny human beings right from wrong and how to be a good person. Pressure much??
  • We always try to pretend to have our sh*t together, even when everything is falling apart.
  • We have to keep our kids clean, or at least keep them looking and smelling clean. Thank God for baby wipe "showers"!
  • We squeeze, suck and shimmy our way into clothes that aid in distracting from the omnipresent belly pooch.
  • We run around the house picking up toys that seem to magically regenerate.
  • We spend hours on the computer researching every rash, bite and funny-sounding cough that comes out of our child's mouth.
  • We lie awake worrying about everything.
  • We are filled with so much love that sometimes our hearts want to explode.
  • Yeah, no wonder we're exhausted. Yes, exhausted. But happy. And honestly, probably a little disheveled.

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