New York

'How May We Hate You' Collects Hilariously Dumb Times Square Tourist Quotes


The "Crossroads of the World" kind of sucks. Can we all just admit that? It's crowded, stuffed full of chain restaurants, and there's just way too many people trying to hand you flyers.

Tourism is great and important and all that, but it's also safe to say that most of the tourists who constantly mill about Times Square are fairly annoying. Most New Yorkers, tend to be pretty indulgent of these tourists because, yeah, the city can be scary and a little overwhelming for first-timers, but there is definitely a limit to our sense of hospitality and these two Times Square hotel concierges found it.

"How may we hate you" ties all of the worst possible experiences with tourists together in a nice neat bow, courtesy of two disillusioned concierges, Anna Drezen and Todd Briscoe, working in a hotel in Times Square. Questions that these concierges parry, range from thoughtful inquries about the current government shutdown:

GUEST: We hear everything in America is shut down.

CONCIERGE: No, sir, just federal government facilities, like the Statue of Liberty.

GUEST: What about, ehhh. Duane Reade?

GUEST: We want to have Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Can you make us a reservation?

CONCIERGE: They don’t actually serve breakfast. (Guest rolls eyes)

GUEST: Well, brunch then.

It's a dark side of the service industry and it should make you want to buy your concierge a drink.

Before You Go

Bill Butterworths Times Square Photos

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