Tips for Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving can be difficult; you have to converse with family members regardless of whether or not you enjoy their company. Here are some tips and tricks to enjoying this time of year.

When you arrive at a family member's house for Thanksgiving dinner, ominously proclaim, "This is the last Thanksgiving", and then proceed to prepare food like you didn't just say that.

When Karen gets there ask, "Hey Karen did you walk from New Jersey?" People will politely laugh, and that's when you intentionally drop a plate while maintaining eye contact with Karen.

Politics can be an awkward topic of conversation, and it's important to be able to swiftly talk about something else. So when anyone says something even remotely political say, "No I don't think so. I don't think so at all"

You know what can be tricky? Figuring out who to serve turkey to first! Start with the oldest member of the family, then of course Karen goes dead last.

Entertaining younger siblings can be hard. You have to have a certain amount of empathy to get along with children much younger than you. A good rule of thumb is all children like it when you print out a picture of their face and then wear it as a mask. They love it when you do that and then ask, "I'm you from the future, I was sent here to warn you that all your fears will become reality! Where is the key? I need the key!"

Sometimes you have to repeat certain things to older family members. Repeating information can get annoying so a trick I use is I give a full-on TED Talk when everyone arrived with a headset and projector exclusively about my life. That way if someone asks me any question at all during dinner I have the right to exclaim, "Was the Ted Talk for nothing? Was the Ted Talk for nothing?"