Like a person on a diet standing in front of a bakery, nothing's tougher than being single during the holidays. Yes, the holidays are a time for family and friends and in theory that should be enough. But for all you singletons out there, let's be honest. It's not.
Just like birthdays, each passing year of single status, is a constant reminder of what you have still failed to accomplish. Sure, maybe you got a promotion. Or bought a new house. But if you still show up at the dinner table without a plus one, it always seems to feel much more monumental.
When I first thought about this blog, I contemplated making it all serious. But that's no fun and I'm definitely not a big proponent of the pity party. So without further ado, here's a top ten list of reasons (who doesn't love a top ten list?!) why it blows chunks to be single during the holidays:
1. Everyone in your immediate family thinks that their behavior is normal (even though it is most definitely not!) A significant other, with a necessary third party perspective, can commiserate with you post meal about how nuts families are.
2. After eating so much you can't move, it's nice having someone other than yourself rub your belly.
3. After hearing Mariah Carey Belt 'All I want for Christmas is you', it would be nice to have someone to snobbishly roll your eyes with while simultaneously thinking, 'Damn straight, I got this.'
4. Presents, obvi. My family isn't big on giving gifts. But if there was a special someone in the equation...
5. To have that incredible arm candy and be able to parade them in front of other singletons, simultaneously giving them sympathetic and slightly obnoxious looks of pity. It's not nice but you know it's true.
6. Eating that second, or third (or fourth) slice of pie and not feeling bad about it. Because hey, you don't need to go trolling for men. You have one right there with you.
7. Standing near the tree in Rockefeller Center all alone. 'Nuff said.
8. It would be nice to have someone there to light your menorah ;)
10. And last but not least, because if one other person says 'honey, why are you still single,' I may need to bash them over the head with a chanukiah.
Happy holidays everyone. May they be filled with family and friends, and if you're single, lots and lots of booze.
Support HuffPost
Our 2024 Coverage Needs You
Your Loyalty Means The World To Us
At HuffPost, we believe that everyone needs high-quality journalism, but we understand that not everyone can afford to pay for expensive news subscriptions. That is why we are committed to providing deeply reported, carefully fact-checked news that is freely accessible to everyone.
Whether you come to HuffPost for updates on the 2024 presidential race, hard-hitting investigations into critical issues facing our country today, or trending stories that make you laugh, we appreciate you. The truth is, news costs money to produce, and we are proud that we have never put our stories behind an expensive paywall.
Would you join us to help keep our stories free for all? Your contribution of as little as $2 will go a long way.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
As Americans head to the polls in 2024, the very future of our country is at stake. At HuffPost, we believe that a free press is critical to creating well-informed voters. That's why our journalism is free for everyone, even though other newsrooms retreat behind expensive paywalls.
Our journalists will continue to cover the twists and turns during this historic presidential election. With your help, we'll bring you hard-hitting investigations, well-researched analysis and timely takes you can't find elsewhere. Reporting in this current political climate is a responsibility we do not take lightly, and we thank you for your support.
Contribute as little as $2 to keep our news free for all.
Can't afford to donate? Support HuffPost by creating a free account and log in while you read.
Dear HuffPost Reader
Thank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.
The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. Would you consider becoming a regular HuffPost contributor?
Dear HuffPost Reader
Thank you for your past contribution to HuffPost. We are sincerely grateful for readers like you who help us ensure that we can keep our journalism free for everyone.
The stakes are high this year, and our 2024 coverage could use continued support. If circumstances have changed since you last contributed, we hope you’ll consider contributing to HuffPost once more.
Support HuffPostAlready contributed? Log in to hide these messages.