In an unusual show of unity, House Republicans joined House Democrats to pass the “TAT” Bill (421-2), which would allocate 300 million dollars towards the rehabilitation of Trump supporters using the controversial Trump Aversion Therapy technique.
Trump Aversion Therapy (TAT) techniques would include the administration of the nausea-inducing drug apomorphine while participants watch Fox News’ Sean Hannity, read stories on Breitbart News, and of course, view clips of Donald Trump’s campaign rallies.
Additionally, TAT snap bands will be distributed to program participants with instructions to snap their wrist while repeating the following phrases: Make America Great Again, She destroyed her emails, But what about Benghazi, But look at what Bill Clinton did, and I’ll date her in ten years.
Sources say Electroconvulsive therapy has not been ruled out, possibly being reserved for Trumps’ female followers, clearly in the most need of help.
Rehabilitation measures will include sensory reattachment therapy. In this phase of the treatment participants will dine on a gluten free meal of sea scallops tartar, mushroom risotto, and grilled wild French turbot, while sipping a California sauvignon blanc, as they enjoy marathon viewing sessions of Rachel Maddow, Beyonce’s Lemonade, and a video feed of the Broadway hit, Hamilton.
Rep. Bob Christian (R-FL), who co-authored the legislation, said, “We hope this will be seen as an olive branch to our Democratic peers,” and then added, “and if we have any hope of ever electing a Republican candidate again – someone who is likely more reprehensible but who hides it better - we need to rid the party of this undesirable, say-exactly-what-we’re-all-thinking type element.
Originally published on The Dandy Goat