MAR-A-LAGO: Goodyear Satire Co.--
"Hillary Clinton was born in Kenya," writes Donald Trump in a furious twitter storm early today. "And I have the proof."
Trump's tweets tell the twisted tale that began with doubts about Hillary Clinton's true gender and her name, and flowered into a disqualifying realization that "she" was born in Kenya under the masculine name "Hilmar Rodham."
Just as Trump did when he proved Barack Obama was born in Kenya, he relies on official records unearthed in Chicago and Kenya.
Trump offers a challenge to voters: "Are you going to believe me or are you going to believe your lying eyes?"
"In light of these revelations, it is clear Hillary is not a legitimate candidate and will not be a legitimate President even after she wins in a landslide, said Trump's new campaign chairman Steve Bannon."
"What do these Kenyans want?" asks Trump.
Trump claims this establishes "beyond a shadow of a doubt" that, as he puts it, "Hillary Clinton does not exist, but Hilmar Clinton does... and he is a Muslim born in Kenya."
"I don't know what scam those people in Chicago and Kenya are running," says Trump, "But whatever it is, I want a part of it."