Unprecedented Number Of Americans Witness Debate Atrocity

Unprecedented Number Of Americans Witness Debate Atrocity

Faced with sharp criticism from all quarters not named David Brooks over last night's attempt at a debate, diminutive, non-flag lapel pin wearing terrorist George Stephanopoulos defended all of ABC's asinine questions, saying, "We asked tough but appropriate questions...When people make that choice, they take into account how candidates stand on the issues," but that they also are concerned with "experience, character [and] credibility."

And in the clearest sign yet that we are about to experience an unprecedented spike in the number of Xanax prescriptions given to the American people, the New York Times' Brian Stetler is reporting that last night's mistreatment of Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama, and the American electorate fetched the highest ratings yet for any debate this primary season:

The debate, the first to air on a weeknight on a broadcast network, attracted an average of 10.7 million viewers between 8 and 10 p.m., according to Nielsen Media Research.

Viewership of the debate peaked between 8:30 and 9 p.m. with 11.8 million viewers, topping the "reality" fare of "Deal or No Deal" on NBC and "Big Brother" on CBS. The broadcast faced stiffer competition at 9 p.m. when "American Idol" appeared on Fox and netted 22.7 million viewers. Still, ABC averaged over 10 million viewers in the second hour of the debate.

Elsewhere, Stephanopoulos stood by the decision to wait an hour before asking any questions pertaining to issues that voters might actually be concerned with:

"We decided to focus at the top on the issues that had been at the center of the debate since the last debate. Everything we brought up in that front section had not come up since the last debate. And they all focused on the same theme -- which candidate would be a stronger Democratic candidate in November....This is the core question for the campaigns, and a lot of Democratic voters right now. That's why we decided to lead with it."

And now, for the rebuttal, please welcome "Soulja Boy" (aka Jay Smooth of Ill Doctrine):

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