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Valentine's Day DOs And DON'Ts For Couples, Single People And The Hopelessly Confused

Valentine's Day DOs And DON'Ts
By 

Senior Comedy & Viral Editor, The Huffington Post

To quote Bart Simpson, "I hate this stupid holiday! The only thing you can do is screw it up."

Amen.

Whether you're single, in a relationship or are so confused by modern dating that you don't even know anymore, here are some Valentine's Day DOs and DON'Ts to help you get through Feb. 14 like a champ.

1
Let's face it, Valentine's Day is something everyone dreads sometimes.
Twitter/GeorgeTakei
::Shudders::
2
If you're single, there's all this unnecessary pressure to have a date.
Pleated Jeans
Whoops.
3
That you actually know.
Imgur
Ahem.
4
A HUMAN date.
Giphycom
AHEM.
5
Even if you're happily single, being alone on Feb. 14 is supposed to be a let down.
Giphy
You say you don't care, but no one believes you.
6
It's not like it was back in elementary school, when V-Day was a no-brainer.
Imgur
Everyone "loves" everyone!
7
If you give an adult a Valentine, you might get rejected.
Giphy
Ugh.
8
So, DON'T resort to using boring, old clichés.
Imgur
Dream big.
9
Or groan-worthy puns.
Mashable
Come on, now.
10
Or... Whatever you call this.
Cheezburger
So romantic we can hardly stand it.
11
DO say something honest, funny and heartfelt.
Etsy
Oh, they'll Instagram this for sure.
12
If you're single, DON'T subject yourself to PDA-filled date night spots.
Giphy
You should probably just avoid any restaurant with a French word in its name.
13
DO take advantage of the fact that it's socially acceptable to gorge yourself on chocolates.
Imgur
Yum.
14
DON'T compare your plans to the people around you.
SpringfieldUSA
Are you kidding me with this?
15
DO be creative in how you celebrate Valentine's Day.
Imgur
It doesn't have to be all lovey-dovey and lame.
16
And DON'T forget that it's not the only holiday on Feb. 14.
Giphy
The point is: you've got options.
17
DO surprise your Valentine with something special.
Imgur
It means even more if you made it yourself!
18
But DON'T expect a grand romantic gesture.
Imgur
No reason to get your hopes up based on stuff you've only seen on TV.
19
DO order a heart-shaped pizza.
Imgur
Seriously, no one will ever turn that down.
20
But DON'T got to far with the heart-shaped stuff.
Imgur
How... sweet?
21
DO tell someone you love them.
Giphy
A must.
22
DON'T think about how creepy Cupid is.
Giphy
A naked, winged baby who shoots you with an arrow? No thanks.
23
DO make roses made out of bacon.
Imgur
Okay, use vegetarian bacon if you must.
24
Or a kinky whip out of Twizzlers.
Imgur
You know, if they're into that kind of thing.
25
But DON'T give a gag gift when they're expecting something nice.
Imgur
Thanks?
26
DO pay attention to what your partner wants.
Tumblr
Even if it's ridiculous.
27
DON'T cheap out on what you eat.
Oh You Mad
If your date has a reservation at White Castle, maybe suggest staying in.
28
DO work on your pick-up lines.
Rebloggy
Nailed it.
29
DON'T Give anyone crabs, ironically or otherwise.
Cheezburger
You're better than this.
30
Or "affordable trash services."
973thedawg
'Nuff said.
31
DO get dressed up.
Imgur
So dapper.
32
And most of all, DON'T take it too seriously.
Tumblr
Seriously, guys. It's just another Friday night.
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