Food & Drink

Vintage Salad Recipes That Make Healthy Eating Impossible

Behold, the worst salad recipes that history has to offer.

Once we've eaten and boozed our way through Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's, it's only natural that by the time we get to the beginning of January many us have resolved to eat healthier. We don't just want to get in better shape, we're actually desperate for the taste of fresh fruits and vegetables.

With the holidays behind us, a salad starts to look a lot better than a plate of fries. Unless of course, you're looking at vintage salad recipes. Then, you might want to run and hide.

Vintage recipes are always pushing the limit with culinary experimentation -- like with this Jell-O dish topped with shrimp frosting -- and they usually make us glad that we didn't have to live through their era. But with recipes as simple as salads, we were sure that nothing could screw them up, not even vintage. We couldn't have been more wrong. And usually, mayonnaise was to blame.

Behold, the worst salad recipes that history has to offer.

Deviled Lettuce Salad
Hey, My Mom Used To Make That!
We're pretty sure this recipe was created by Satan.
Peach Blossom Salad
Chronically Vintage
Nothing says "fresh" like a salad covered in canned peaches.
Party Potato Salad
Hey, My Mom Used To Make That!
The gelatin-mayo glaze that covers this potato salad loaf makes us question all that is good in this world.
Tropic Topknot Salads
Hey, My Mom Used To Make That!
Listen guys, fruit and mayonnaise is never a good idea. Ever.
Cottage Cheese And Kidney Bean Salad
My Mink Betty
If the combination of the two main ingredients hasn't yet made your stomach turn, let's throw in some French dressing, cabbage and MILK.
Cranberry Candle Salad
Retro Planet
Because we all want to eat a salad in an "elegant candle shape," right?
Super Supper Salad Loaf
Hey, My Mom Used To Make That!
We barely made it past the 1/2 pound piece of bologna in this ingredient list, and we stopped cold as soon as gelatin entered the picture.
Creamy Fruit Salad Dressing
Recipe Curio
Here's the secret to ruining fruit forever: mayonnaise, sour cream and corn syrup.
Man-Pleaser Salads
Etsy: CookbookMaven
We will never think of salads the same way again thanks to this book's sexual innuendos.
Mixed Vegetable Jell-O Salad
Click Americana
We've seen enough Jell-O salads in our life to tolerate the concept, but mixed vegetable Jell-O flavor is an idea we will never get behind.

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Salad Recipes