- On weekends
- On sick days
- During "in service" days
- Over summer break
Whether we are stay-at-home moms (SAHM), work-from-home moms, budding entrepreneurs, part-time workers, consultants, writers, bloggers, or freelancers... we are all at home with our kids, at some point. So we're all stay-at-home moms in my opinion.
We all struggle with nap times, feeding schedules, preparing snacks, cleaning up Legos.
We schedule play dates, bake/buy cupcakes for school, plan birthdays, and use our own sleeves to wipe up their boogies (yup).
And it can be hard. It can be so freaking hard.
No matter what we do for "work" we all transition from weekday to weekend* and then back to weekday.
Maybe for you, the weekend is a break -- as a spouse, family member or babysitter takes over -- so you can escape to Target, practice yoga or more likely, hide under the covers to binge on Netflix. (Woo hoo!)
Or perhaps the weekend is a break from crazy Corporate America, from your devil-wears-Prada-like-boss -- whereby giggling with your kids and tickling their toes suddenly gives your life meaning again.
And still, maybe after surviving the rollercoaster of emotions (from joy, to frustration, to exhaustion), you secretly look forward to going back to work/returning to solo parenting so that it will be done "your way."
Yes?
No choice is perfect. No "side" is better.
For me, I've:
- been the new mom, dropping off my 3-month cherub at daycare, bawling the entire drive to the office.
- been the frequent flier, racing through airports, ducking in to a bathroom to PUMP (yup, ick).
- worked from home, listening to the nanny in the next room soothing my colicky baby (excruciating).
- missed a kid's field trip -- to attend an exhilarating work conference (totally worth it).
- skipped an Executive presentation to attend my preschooler's first play (also - totally worth it).
It's confusing. For all of us.
Maybe you're a SAHM or WFHM and friends/spouse/relatives/internet trolls wonder: what do you do ALL day? Why is the house messy and dinner not prepared?
Why? Why? Why?
Because we're tired. Whether at home all day or returning home in the evenings, we're freaking tired.
Me? I work because I love to (oh and also need to pay the bills...) But other mamas are rocking it their own way-- doing whatever is right for them and their family - staying at home, working from home, starting their own businesses, jet-setting around the world.
Newsflash: there's not ONE best choice on how to parent (even Sheryl Sandberg recanted her original "Lean In" stance).
So we should all be proud and support each other. After all, we just want to be good role models for our kids, right?
For them to see us happy, fulfilled, and maybe not batsh$t crazy all the time...
Right?
So yeah, in my opinion, we are all "stay at home" moms -- at some point...
However you choose to parent, trust that you're doing what you need to do.
You got this.
YOU DO YOU.
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*however you define your "weekend"
Jennie Sutherland lives in Austin, Texas, with her husband and two active daughters.
For more, please follow Jennie on Twitter: @jenniesuth or check out this or this.