We Will Never Ever Be Together

Save that word for someone special, not some ding-dong in math class. Congratulations! I just saved you money you could've spent on boxes of Kleenex and chocolates.
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"A powerful pair of spectacles has sometimes sufficed to cure a person in love," Friedrich Nietzsche said. While, because of my belief system, I detest anything that comes out of this man's mouth, he had a good point.

Valentine's Day rolled around last week and, like every year, I rolled my eyes again at all the cute gestures and presents that flooded my school and the country.

Love is a word that is thrown around way too loosely. It's one of those things that falls too freely from the mouths of those who spend their time watching rom coms into oblivion and foaming at the mouth over a photograph of a young Leonardo DiCaprio. People stuff their faces with chocolates on Valentine's Day, which they bought for themselves on a clearance sell at CVS because no one wanted to be their Valentine five days ago.

It's also a word thrown around by a 16-year-old who has just gotten into his first relationship, who hopes that this one will last, and then finds out six months later that the girl's been cheating on him since the day they got together.

Now trust me, I'm not a cynic. Or maybe I am. I don't know yet. But one thing I'm sure of is that the word "love" needs to be given a rest, or at least used at the appropriate times, not unconsciously saying "I love you," "I love you, too, baby" every 20 seconds.

Let me tell you a story. Maybe this will clear things up: I have never loved anyone. Let me clarify. I have never loved anyone in a romantic way. Why? I'm too picky. I get bored easily and, overall, it seems like I just can't get a grip on this thing called "love." I don't know why, but the ideal has just never come my way. Sure, I've liked people. Everyone has had that time or two where they were the doe-eyed 9-year-old in math class, staring across the room at the cutie in the front row. They were so beautiful, talented, smart and funny. But then, like Nietzsche, after a few weeks, you put some glasses on and you realize, "God, I'm such an idiot," because you see that they just aren't right for you.

I cannot stand to see my friends in school constantly break up, make up, and break up again. There's the girl who knows her boyfriend is cheating and that she isn't even attracted to him anymore, but she still feels the need to fill some void in her life. Poor, poor you. And don't get me started on the celebrities in tabloids. Why can't you put on some glasses and see that it's done? This is what makes me reject love.

So now, I declare a moratorium on the word "love." Use it when you meet someone and you're mature enough to handle it. I know you all are probably saying, "C'mon, Matt, take a chance," but sorry, as far as I'm concerned, YOLO is dead and high school romance is nonexistent, unless you're lucky.

Save that word for someone special, not some ding-dong in math class. Congratulations! I just saved you money you could've spent on boxes of Kleenex and chocolates.

And, for the love of God, someone please tell Taylor Swift to stop.

DISCLAIMER: While these are my feelings, this is mainly a cynical, perhaps humorous rant. I'm not that dead inside.

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